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#1121661 12/30/16 12:39 AM
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Good evening JPFers! I first posted my g/v of this song about 2 years ago. With the help of some insightful critiques, I re-wrote it until I was happy with it. I'd love your thoughts on it now that it's all grown up! But, just so you know, it's done now and I don't foresee re-doing it. I just wanted to share. Thanks for listening. Again.

P.S. Definitely NOT me singing!

https://soundcloud.com/rickib/raven-flies

RAVEN FLIES

Tattoo on a pearl grey sky
Raven flies, I hear his cry
Tidings of a sad goodbye

What becomes of an angry man
With a gun clenched in his hand
His made up mind won’t understand

He rode to save my honor
Someone else got in the way
Now he’ll live with it forever
And they’ll hunt him down till his dying day

Please don’t leave me here, I begged
We can take the riverbed
He slipped away alone instead

The real villain never pays
Hearts are broken everyday
Sometimes a woman has no say

He rode to save my honor
Someone else got in the way
Now he’ll live with it forever
And they’ll hunt him down till his dying day

Soaring high above his tracks
Feathers purple, green and black
Raven says my man’s never coming back

He rode to save my honor
Someone else got in the way
Now he’ll live with it forever
And they’ll hunt him down till his dying day

Tattoo on a pearl grey sky
Raven flies, I hear his cry


©Ricki E. Bellos (BMI)



Last edited by Ricki E. Bellos; 12/31/16 05:26 PM.
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Hi Ricki,


W O W, I'm impressed.
Cool music and your vocals soar like the raven.


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

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Always enjoy your stuff Ricki. smile

Calvin #1121671 12/30/16 01:23 PM
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Thanks Calvin but I only sing like this in my dreams. That would be Kris Bradley.

Ricki

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Thanks for checking it out, Martin.

Ricki

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Awesome Ricki!You should be proud of this one,excellent job from everyone.Mike

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Hey Ricki, a little different sound from you.

It's a good one.

Vic


It's never too late? Yes it is, so do it now.

If, given time, a monkey can write the complete works of Shakespeare maybe there's hope for me.

http://store.cdbaby.com/cd/vicarnold2

http://www.soundclick.com/vicarnold

http://soundcloud.com/vic-arnold

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Thanks, Mike, glad you liked it. They are all excellent artists.

Ricki

Vicarn #1121683 12/30/16 03:22 PM
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Thanks Vic, the big difference being the country flavor. You did notice the line where I say it isn't me singing, right? smile

Ricki

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I listened to this a couple of times because I like it!! Great vocal on this, the music tells the story and moves and is catchy, I was totally into this, what a great song all around!!

Tammy


http://tammyjann.com/
https://soundcloud.com/tamsnumber4
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=1038504

Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it...
Professor Albus Dumbledore




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Thanks for listening, Tammy, and twice at that! smile

Ricki

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Hi Ricki:

Very nice... and Kris really "tore it up" on the vocal. Great story with enough left for the listener to use his/her imagination. Enjoyed very much. ----Dave

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Excellent work, Ricki. I like your voice, too.

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Thanks for listening Dave. Kris really made it her own.

Ricki

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Thanks Jim, and I assume you meant the writing? That is not my vocal.

Ricki

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You picked a good vocalist for this one. Great music, too, got that classic sound. Emmy Lou would have done this one in her hey day. Sounds mighty fine to me. Cool story too.


"Good science comes in peer reviewed journals. Conspiracy theories come in YouTube videos. "
Kevin @ bandcamp: Crows Say Vee-Eh (and Kevin @50/90 2019)
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Thanks for giving this a listen, Kevin. Glad you liked it.

Ricki

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Ricki,

Glad you shared--loved it!

steady-eddie.

E Swartz #1121893 01/03/17 08:29 PM
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Thanks Eddie.

Ricki

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Hi Ricki,

This is a really well produced demo. I love the steel guitar work and the muted guitar in the right channel.

This would have worked very well in episode 9 or 10 of "Westworld" --it kind of describes Dolores' plight.

Very well written story and the vocals are earnest mostly but sassy when they need to be.

Great work!


Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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Great finished product Ricki!
You should be proud of what you've done here.
It sounds very professional and I like the way the lyrics progress throughout the song. smile
Great job!!!
Paul

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Great song! Great performance. Excellent!

John

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Thanks Mike, I think Kris really brought her A game. And I hope to get to see Westworld someday on a TV near me! smile

Ricki

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Thanks Paul and while I'm proud of the write, it's the singer and musicians who bring the song to life, and for that, I am grateful.

Ricki

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Thanks for listening John.

Ricki

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Catchy as a bad cold, Ricki. I really enjoyed tapping my toes to it.

Stevie


I'm the only person here who is not unique.
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grin I don't think I've ever heard that one, Stevie B! Glad you enjoyed it.

Ricki


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