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#917858 08/25/11 06:47 PM
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I hear this as a low to mid tempo blues with the chorus lyrics really bitten off.



Bring Your Spoon
c.2011 J.Brieler

v1
There's a brown-bearded man
In a beat down Dodge
Who insists on blocking my way
He's itching for a scrap
But I'm more in the mood
For a scoop of Cherry Jerry Surprise

c.
I brought a spoon to a knife fight
I hold my mug in my fist tight
Better fed than proven right
Full belly lets me sleep at night

v2
There's a skinny twitchy girl
With her hair pulled back
Don't like the way I raise my son
She thinks she's got the truth
But I damn well know
She needs a healthy bowl of jambalaya

c.
I brought a spoon to a knife fight
I hold my mug in my fist tight
Better fed than proven right
Full belly lets me sleep at night

v3
There's a pretty politician
With store-bought teeth
Thinking he can fix the land
He wants to slice the pie
But I already shared
My cobbler with every man alive

c.
I brought a spoon to a knife fight
I hold my mug in my fist tight
Better fed than proven right
Full belly lets me sleep at night


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I do like Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia!I do LOVE jambalaya!I've never tried your cobbler though!I understand that you have the spoon but where does the knife fit in?[not my back,i hope]That kinda threw me.I see where the singer gets mad but i never see the fight,just wondering.

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I agree with Michael. Maybe change the hook to

"It's like bringing a spoon to a knife fight"

Therefore you can use it across all 3 stories...

I like where you're going with this. It made me chuckle a bit with the tongue in cheekiness... smile

Good start here.

Peace,

Dave


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It took me a second but I realize there is a major issue with tense...the majority is in present tense but that first line is in past, so the listener is expecting the old story.

I thought I'd use "I bring my spoon to the knife fights" I think that keeps it in present tense, let's me keep the words short and clipped.

Thanks both of you for taken time to check this out.

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I think you are on the right track to clear up the tense issue... and I really like this one... yeah, people spend too much time and energy being angry (and slicing and dicing all the issues).. just call me when it's time to eat! smile

Nice writing!

--Jen


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I like this one Nevergoback and go along with Jen here. The lyric flows really well.You told me that you play guitar? I'd like to hear what you have in mind for this one music wise.
For now best of luck with it
Regards
Travis


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Hi NeverGoBack,

This is cute and I love the image of bringing a spoon to a knife fight! Very clever!

Lisa

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This song has tension and suspension, and I can hear it almost in a "Bad to the bone" style of vocals, i enjoyed the lyric a lot.~~~MFB III

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MFB - I very much had a Thorogood type of vibe in mind when this thing was going onto paper. In some places I even heard that kind of nasty slide. Wish I could play slide worth a lick. Thanks for checking it out.

Lisa, I'd been reading some songwriting articles and one thing that stuck with me is a good starting place is a great hook. I was playing around with someone with plastic silverware at breakfast and someone said "Brought a fork to a knife fight" which reminded me of one of my favorite lines of all time "It's like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife." The rest of the song came from that. Glad it works for you.

David, I've got 2 or 3 different ways this could sit on chords. It's really easy to put this on a straight blues rock, but that's not the style I play live. I'm actually letting the other guy in my duo play with it just to see what he comes up with.


Jen, thanks for checking this out. You get the point exactly.

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Hi Again NGB -- It definitely is an image that I won't forget -- I could see it even becoming such a common saying that it would one day become a cliche (I mean that in a good way)! And you really simplified the 10,000 spoons line to one spoon and then weaved it in with the common cliche of bringing a gun to a knife fight. Very cool! Lisa

Last edited by Lisa Gundling; 08/26/11 07:18 PM.
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Thanks Lisa, I gave this to my singer and he was dinking around and his wife said something to the effect of "Where'd I hear that before?" I googled the phrase. Nothing. That's a good sign.

We did this at practice tonight and I'm stoked. Blues rock, stanky, the singer worked off of a Tom Waits tune, and I'm very happy with the result. The chorus is slightly different but...y'all see. Next step is the mp3 forum.


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