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Joined: Apr 2006
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I hear this as a low to mid tempo blues with the chorus lyrics really bitten off.
Bring Your Spoon c.2011 J.Brieler
v1 There's a brown-bearded man In a beat down Dodge Who insists on blocking my way He's itching for a scrap But I'm more in the mood For a scoop of Cherry Jerry Surprise
c. I brought a spoon to a knife fight I hold my mug in my fist tight Better fed than proven right Full belly lets me sleep at night
v2 There's a skinny twitchy girl With her hair pulled back Don't like the way I raise my son She thinks she's got the truth But I damn well know She needs a healthy bowl of jambalaya
c. I brought a spoon to a knife fight I hold my mug in my fist tight Better fed than proven right Full belly lets me sleep at night
v3 There's a pretty politician With store-bought teeth Thinking he can fix the land He wants to slice the pie But I already shared My cobbler with every man alive
c. I brought a spoon to a knife fight I hold my mug in my fist tight Better fed than proven right Full belly lets me sleep at night
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Joined: Jan 2005
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I do like Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia!I do LOVE jambalaya!I've never tried your cobbler though!I understand that you have the spoon but where does the knife fit in?[not my back,i hope]That kinda threw me.I see where the singer gets mad but i never see the fight,just wondering.
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Joined: Aug 2006
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I agree with Michael. Maybe change the hook to "It's like bringing a spoon to a knife fight" Therefore you can use it across all 3 stories... I like where you're going with this. It made me chuckle a bit with the tongue in cheekiness... Good start here. Peace, Dave
"Where there's a Gill, there's a way"
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Joined: Apr 2006
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It took me a second but I realize there is a major issue with tense...the majority is in present tense but that first line is in past, so the listener is expecting the old story.
I thought I'd use "I bring my spoon to the knife fights" I think that keeps it in present tense, let's me keep the words short and clipped.
Thanks both of you for taken time to check this out.
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Joined: Jun 2011
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I think you are on the right track to clear up the tense issue... and I really like this one... yeah, people spend too much time and energy being angry (and slicing and dicing all the issues).. just call me when it's time to eat! Nice writing! --Jen
The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work.--Mark Twain
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Joined: Jun 2011
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I like this one Nevergoback and go along with Jen here. The lyric flows really well.You told me that you play guitar? I'd like to hear what you have in mind for this one music wise. For now best of luck with it Regards Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Jan 2006
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Hi NeverGoBack,
This is cute and I love the image of bringing a spoon to a knife fight! Very clever!
Lisa
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Joined: Aug 2010
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This song has tension and suspension, and I can hear it almost in a "Bad to the bone" style of vocals, i enjoyed the lyric a lot.~~~MFB III
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Joined: Apr 2006
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MFB - I very much had a Thorogood type of vibe in mind when this thing was going onto paper. In some places I even heard that kind of nasty slide. Wish I could play slide worth a lick. Thanks for checking it out.
Lisa, I'd been reading some songwriting articles and one thing that stuck with me is a good starting place is a great hook. I was playing around with someone with plastic silverware at breakfast and someone said "Brought a fork to a knife fight" which reminded me of one of my favorite lines of all time "It's like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife." The rest of the song came from that. Glad it works for you.
David, I've got 2 or 3 different ways this could sit on chords. It's really easy to put this on a straight blues rock, but that's not the style I play live. I'm actually letting the other guy in my duo play with it just to see what he comes up with.
Jen, thanks for checking this out. You get the point exactly.
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Joined: Jan 2006
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Hi Again NGB -- It definitely is an image that I won't forget -- I could see it even becoming such a common saying that it would one day become a cliche (I mean that in a good way)! And you really simplified the 10,000 spoons line to one spoon and then weaved it in with the common cliche of bringing a gun to a knife fight. Very cool! Lisa
Last edited by Lisa Gundling; 08/26/11 07:18 PM.
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Joined: Apr 2006
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Thanks Lisa, I gave this to my singer and he was dinking around and his wife said something to the effect of "Where'd I hear that before?" I googled the phrase. Nothing. That's a good sign.
We did this at practice tonight and I'm stoked. Blues rock, stanky, the singer worked off of a Tom Waits tune, and I'm very happy with the result. The chorus is slightly different but...y'all see. Next step is the mp3 forum.
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