Who's Online Now
10 members (Fdemetrio, VNORTH2, Gary E. Andrews, Perry Neal Crawford, couchgrouch, Sunset Poet, Guy E. Trepanier, bennash, Bill Draper, David Gill), 4,088 guests, and 270 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Register Today!
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.

By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
ShoutChat
Comment Guidelines: Do post respectful and insightful comments. Don't flame, hate, spam.
What's Going On
Does Billy Joel belong in top 10?
by Fdemetrio - 03/28/24 11:10 PM
It Is Done
by Sunset Poet - 03/28/24 07:44 PM
Music Industry Summit, Athens Ohio
by Gary E. Andrews - 03/28/24 06:14 PM
Can you save me from me
by VNORTH2 - 03/28/24 03:11 PM
As human as yo
by ckiphen - 03/28/24 09:55 AM
Fox News Reports Stunning Archeological Discovery.
by couchgrouch - 03/27/24 08:02 PM
Wasting My Time
by David Gill - 03/27/24 07:42 AM
Song available
by JAPOV - 03/26/24 03:38 PM
YELLIN AT CLOUDS
by David Gill - 03/26/24 03:20 PM
"Reliving" the great Lou Rawls!
by Brian Austin Whitney - 03/26/24 01:49 PM
::: The Best In My Life :::
by Bill Draper - 03/26/24 01:32 PM
The show must go on
by ckiphen - 03/26/24 09:06 AM
NYC Motel 1972
by rpirone - 03/26/24 12:43 AM
usic Industry Summitt
by Gary E. Andrews - 03/25/24 11:32 PM
The Rant Arena
by JAPOV - 03/25/24 07:39 PM
Song available
by Raymond Byabazaire - 03/25/24 11:55 AM
Song available
by Raymond Byabazaire - 03/25/24 11:55 AM
Lancaster Festival, Lancaster, Ohio
by Gary E. Andrews - 03/25/24 10:51 AM
Wasting my time
by Rob B. - 03/25/24 03:45 AM
Tom Waits.. What's he building
by Fdemetrio - 03/25/24 12:09 AM
Rick Beato, bad lyrics
by Fdemetrio - 03/24/24 11:23 PM
Inspirational Videos Post Them Here
by Sunset Poet - 03/24/24 11:27 AM
Used to take a Genius to Mix
by Fdemetrio - 03/23/24 11:00 AM
She’s missing but she ain’t missing him
by ckiphen - 03/23/24 08:44 AM
"Broken Places"
by Gary E. Andrews - 03/22/24 07:45 PM
All You Are Is A Lie
by Sunset Poet - 03/22/24 06:55 PM
Pour Choices
by Gavin Sinclair - 03/22/24 05:29 PM
Billy's 30 year overdue song.
by Fdemetrio - 03/22/24 01:30 PM
Make my dreams come true
by ckiphen - 03/22/24 10:51 AM
Top Posters
Calvin 19,857
Travis david 12,264
Kevin Emmrich 10,941
Jean Bullock 10,330
Kaley Willow 10,240
Two Singers 9,649
Joice Marie 9,186
Mackie H. 9,003
glynda 8,683
Mike Dunbar 8,574
Tricia Baker 8,318
couchgrouch 8,160
Colin Ward 7,911
Corey 7,357
Vicarn 6,916
Mark Kaufman 6,589
ben willis 6,114
Lynn Orloff 5,788
Louis 5,725
Linda Sings 5,608
KimberlyinNC 5,210
Fdemetrio 4,990
Neil Cotton 4,909
Derek Hines 4,893
DonnaMarilyn 4,670
Blake Hill 4,528
Bob Cushing 4,389
Roy Cooper 4,271
Bill Osofsky 4,199
Tom Shea 4,195
Cindy Miller 4,178
TamsNumber4 4,171
MFB III 4,143
Sunset Poet 4,126
nightengale 4,096
E Swartz 3,985
JAPOV 3,973
beechnut79 3,878
Caroline 3,865
Kolstad 3,845
Dan Sullivan 3,710
Dottie 3,427
joewatt 3,411
Bill Cooper 3,279
John Hoffman 3,199
Skip Johnson 3,027
Pam Hurley 3,007
Terry G 3,005
Nigel Quin 2,891
PopTodd 2,890
Harriet Ames 2,870
MidniteBob 2,761
Nelson 2,616
Tom Tracy 2,558
Jerry Jakala 2,524
Al Alvarez 2,499
Eric Thome 2,448
Hummingbird 2,401
Stan Loh 2,263
Sam Wilson 2,246
Wendy D 2,235
Judy Hollier 2,232
Erica Ellis 2,202
maccharles 2,134
TrumanCoyote 2,096
Marty Helly 2,041
DukeWill 2,002
floyd jane 1,985
Clint Anglin 1,904
cindyrella 1,888
David Wright 1,866
Clairejeanne 1,851
Cindy LaRosa 1,824
Ronald Boyt 1,675
Iggy 1,652
Noel Downs 1,633
Rick Heenan 1,608
Cal 1,574
GocartMoz 1,559
Jack Swain 1,554
Pete Larsen 1,537
Ann Tygart 1,529
Tom Breshers 1,487
RogerS 1,481
Tom Franz 1,473
Chuck Crowe 1,441
Ralph Blight 1,440
Rick Norton 1,429
Kenneth Cade 1,429
bholt 1,411
Letha Allen 1,409
in2piano 1,404
Stan Simons 1,402
Deej56 1,385
mattbanx 1,384
Jen Shaner 1,373
Charlie Wong 1,347
KevinP 1,324
Vondelle 1,316
Tom W. 1,313
Jan Petter 1,301
scottandrew 1,294
lane1777 1,280
Gerry 1,280
DakLander 1,265
IronKnee 1,262
PeteG 1,242
Ian Ferrin 1,235
Glen King 1,214
VNORTH2 1,212
IdeaGuy 1,209
AaronAuthier 1,177
summeoyo 1,174
Diane Ewing 1,162
ckiphen 1,120
joro 1,082
BobbyJoe 1,075
S.DEE 1,040
yann 1,037
9ne 1,035
David Gill 1,032
Tony A 1,016
argo 986
peaden 984
90 dB 964
Wolvman 960
Jak Kelly 912
krtinberg 890
Drifter 886
Petra 883
RJC 845
Brenda152 840
Nadia 829
ant 798
Juan 797
TKO 784
Dayson 781
frahmes 781
bennash 763
teletwang 762
Andy K 750
Andy Kemp 749
tbryson 737
Jackie444 731
Irwin 720
3daveyO3 704
Dixie 701
Joy Boy 695
Pat Hardy 692
Knute 686
Lee Arten 678
Moosesong 668
Katziis 652
R.T.MOORE 638
quality 637
CG King 622
douglas 621
R&M 614
Mel 614
NaomiSue 601
Shandy 590
Ria 587
TAMERA64 583
qbaum 570
nitepiano 566
pRISCILLA 556
Tink2 553
musica 539
deanbell 528
RobertK 527
BonzaiWag 523
Roderic 522
BB Wilbur 513
goodfolks 499
Zeek 487
Stu 486
Steve P. 481
KathyW 462
allenb 459
MaxG 458
Philjo 454
fanito 448
trush48 448
dmk 442
Rob L 439
arealrush 437
DGR 436
avweek 435
Stephen D 433
Emmy 431
marquez 422
kit 419
Softkrome 417
kyrksongs 415
RRon 408
Laura G. 407
VNORTH 407
Debra 407
eb 406
cuebald 399
EdPerrone 399
Dannyk1 395
Hobart 395
Davyboy49 393
Smile 389
GJShades 387
Alek 386
Ezt 384
tone 380
Marla 380
Ann_F 379
iggyiggy 378
coalminer 377
java 374
ddreuter 371
spidey 371
sweetsong 370
danny 367
Rob B. 364
Jim Ryan 360
papaG 353
Z - man 350
JamesDF5 348
John K 348
Jaden 344
TheBaz 340
Steggy 339
leif 339
tonedeaf 336
rickwork 334
Eddie Ray 332
Johnboy 328
Bob Lever 328
Helicon1 327
lucian 326
Muskie 321
kc 319
Z. Mulls 318
ptondreau 313
ONOFFON 312
Chris B. 310
trush 304
ed323 297
Ellen M 294
markus-ky 293
lizzorn 291
nicnac49 290
Char 286
ktunes 285
Top Likes Received
JAPOV 86
VNORTH2 45
bennash 38
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Rate Thread
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Hi guys
Stan and I joined in song making contest here in the Philippines and this is our entry. Its about the motorcycle riding experience and probably they going to use it for their product jingle or in every promotion

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JeP2LJ0hHk

Crits are highly welcome and highly appreciated. We want to improve our baby a little more and push it to its full potential.

Thanks in advance.

Lynman

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 415
K
Top 500 Poster
Offline
Top 500 Poster
K
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 415
Lynman/Stan
Very catchy tune. I enjoyed listening to it, I even enjoyed watching the video. I don't have any comments for improvenment
but hopefully you will get more comments.
Kyrk


I have never been lost, but I will admit to being confused for several weeks. (Daniel Boone)
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
cool song about life but if i didn't see the video i wouldn't have known it was a song about motorcycling.What type of product are they selling?Just wondering.I hope the best for ya'll though!!!

Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
"
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
"
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
HiDee Cap'n!

Doc's entering this in a Contest sponsored by Yamaha..in the Philippines--I've already tweaked the lyrics a bit/definitely open to further Sugs!

Thanks for Your Kind Visit, Amigo!

Best Weekend Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
"
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
"
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
HiDee CycleGuy...you da man we wants Feedback-from..heh-heh!

I didn't originally pen this about cycling whatsoever, but Doc's gota really Good Memory, & put it to music.

& yeah, the Vid really helps it with what he's got in-mind.

I'm hearing a few lines that could use some trimmin' & simplifying, so feel-free to Sug-Away, Amigo!

I'm off to the garage to crank up my Kawasaki/may run it around the block today...but still am about $400-500 shy of Tags/Title Transfer/& Cycle Classes...to be fully-legit. DID finally learn it Won't Crank unless the kickstand is UP..heh..so as of last week, it's Firing Up...& Real Tempting to whip it around the block on this beautiful, cool & Sunny-Sunday!

Say a Prayer for me...& hope ya got a few Sugs, as-well!

Best Wishes & Adios, Amigo!
Stan

Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Hey Stan and Lynman,i'll see what i can do with the lyric keeping the melody the same,and of course you can use it or shred it!I just think the video should show Yamaha's throughout and the lifestyle,not these other types of things like swimming and office people you have on the video.It's about "motorcycles"!
That's what you're trying to sell here,right?Good luck you two!
There's dirt bikes,street bikes,touring bikes,all sorts of Yamaha's including ATV's [i think].

Last edited by Michael LeBlanc; 10/30/11 10:02 PM.
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
hey Stan,i sent you a PM,you can send to Lynman,thanx,it was fun!

Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
"
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
"
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
Thanks Amigo..I'm off to take a peek right now!

(Bad luck with the Kawasaki today..wouldn't crank! Engine did try a wee bit..but no go. Battery wasn't down...sooo....Gulp!

Sat almost a month..WAS told to crank it weekly, but wouldn't even whir...'til I learned it has to have the Kickstand UP or it stays off. So..voila..it cranked,I ran it in-place 'till engine was hot...then shut 'er down...last weekend.

& then today, it ALMOST fired up, but fizzled like Hugh Heffner's latest marriage..after 3 near-goes.

So...it's leanin' against the '27 Chevy Pickup..with the stuck engine...in the garage which has a Jag XJ6 right outside...also with a dead engine...& my Doorstop Collection is gettin' pretty hefty of-late!!!

Thanks for the Sugs, which I'll FWD to Doc, somehow!

Best Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug..High Five Too, if I ever get this bike on da Road..heh!
Gettin' LOTS of Exercize Pushin' These Days, Stan

Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 12,082
Likes: 1
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 12,082
Likes: 1
I think it's great guys - really catchy and it's got a lot of energy. Love the "heys" smile

Not sure what to suggest about the contest. Does it include video or just audio? If it's video, this might work if you use more (or all) motorcycle images. If audio, I would think the lyric would have to be changed, like Michael said.

I like the lyric a lot - I don't think it needs changed to improve the song, only to fit the contest better.

Best of luck - would be pretty cool to know the guys that got the song in a new Yamaha commercial smile

Scott








Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,262
Likes: 19
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,262
Likes: 19
Hey guys...how about,"Life Goes On (Make A Diffrence)"
Make it Diffrent?? It just doesn't catch me...seems less potent.
Anyways.....great sound....great message....good luck with this guys!!
-Tom

Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
"
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
"
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 29,275
Thanks Lots, Scott & Tom, for your input here! (REAL
Good Hook-Change Sug, Brother Tommy!!!) Good Insight Too, NeighborGuy Scott!!!

If CycleGuy is a-reading, your PM..alas..didn't post at This End of the Pipeline...Dern It!!!

Doc, Thanks for posting this Video here..I know ya've already invested Tons of Talent, Time, & loot to get it THIS far...&..I hope the Yamaha Folks enjoy it as much as I already Do!

Good Luck with it, Amigo...(I already have begun hating my Kawasaki that didn't-wanna-start..over the weekend...)

Best Wishes to ALL, & Major-League Guy-Hugs, All-Around,
Stan

Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 413
B
Top 500 Poster
Offline
Top 500 Poster
B
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 413
Music and lyrics are catch, consistent, and convincing.

There should be enough material within that song for Yahama to choose from for their TV spots or whatever. There should be no need to adapt the lyrics throughout since they only will use a couple seconds anyway.

I found the song slightly too long, a few seconds (and repetitions) less might tighten it.

Cheers,
Bernd


Bernd
[url]http://bernd-harmsen.com[/url]
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 8,490
Top 20 Poster
Offline
Top 20 Poster
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 8,490
I love the inspiring message and catchy tune (sticks with you after the song ends) -- and think that the motorcycle images will add great oomph for the Yamaha pitch! Very NICE!! -- Lisa

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 9,649
Top 20 Poster
Offline
Top 20 Poster
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 9,649
Hey Guys...

Real nice pitch here! I kinda agree with Mr. LeBlanc about keeping the video focused the Yamaha bikes, unless you can tie the other stuff into the arena of Yamaha bikes.

Full of energy and kept me moving down the road! Nice work!!!

Al

Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 10,941
Likes: 3
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 10,941
Likes: 3
Sounds like it would make a good jingle to me -- they would only use 10-15 seconds of it in a 30-second commercial anyway.


"Good science comes in peer reviewed journals. Conspiracy theories come in YouTube videos. "
Kevin @ bandcamp: Crows Say Vee-Eh (and Kevin @50/90 2019)
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 971
C
Top 500 Poster
Offline
Top 500 Poster
C
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 971
'Morning again, Stan...and Lynman, this time...

Stan, you are sure surrounding yourself with good people.

Lynman, we've never met, but gotta say, I'm impressed. The music's good, the video's cool. Makes me wanna get up and do SOMETHING! I should go to bed, since I work midnights...

But this was a cool day to end my day. Thanks...both of you. Stan, don't forget yer helmet...

Clark.

Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Kyrksongs: Thanks for visiting and liking this collaboration. I dont know if this is a work in progress song. But who knows it is a matter of chance if we won in this contest then the lyrics is final but if we are not the lucky ones I still feel that this song needs a little more tweaking especially when I discussed it with Stan like the choice of words of speed and versatility. We still want this songs to be a global, preachy, mind setting, and too motivational songs and can be used by all walks of life.

Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Michael: Thanks for your visits too. Im not a motorcycle guy because my wife dont agree with the idea of me on those 2 wheeled beast. Im still dreaming to have a Harley but anyways. This is Yamaha and I first encountered Yamaha as a makers of musical instruments in fact their logo is a 3 tuning forks that looks like a wheel. Im looking forward for your suggestion and I beleive your first hand experience in motorcycling to associate the idea is badly badly needed. Maybe Stan will shift his product from Kawasaki to Yamaha because we are all in the field of music eh?

Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Scott:
Thanks for giving your time to this one. The heys are all Stans final tweaking on lyrics... The video is not important or even the pictures just the lyrics and music... WE cannot help to put something in our youtube presentation because the main theme of the contest is to make a difference. In fact some of people who submitted their songs they included the whole music video with some of the riders who are doing this crazy dance $hit.

What ever happens in the songwriting contest we have another avenue to market his songs.

Lynman

Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Tom: We will consider your input.. we are chained by the contest rule but I see the maleability of the lyrics and melody. Thanks a lot!!!
Lynman

Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Bernd: Thanks!!! you are right the song is too long and not suitable for a jingle. I dont have the whole idea about the yamaha concept. Maybe they are looking for a band who can tour with them to promote their beast in every corner and this song is probably their flagship song... That why I put the hey! thing in every verse

Lynman

Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Lisa, Al and David:
Thanks for your inspiring words to this collaboration. Stan and are hoping to nail this... We will inform you in 2 weeks time about the fate of our baby.

Lynman

Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,222
Clark:
Thanks and it's so nice to meet you too.
Im glad you are impressed and motivated with the songs. This is what we are trying to impart to the motorcycle drivers around the world...

Lynman


Link Copied to Clipboard
Support Just Plain Folks

We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.


Newest Members
chriscastle, yasir252, cathennashira, Samwise, HappySousa
21,470 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums117
Topics125,717
Posts1,160,950
Members21,470
Most Online37,523
Jan 25th, 2020
Just Plain Quotes
"If one man can do it, any man can do it. It is true. But the real question is, if one man did it, are you willing to do what it takes to do it as well?" –Brian Austin Whitney
Today's Birthdays
warriorgirl (2024)
Popular Topics(Views)
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5