This is really good. The characters and dialog are excellent. I love the phrases descriptive phrases like.. 'horseshow jaw' 'a forhead you could pitch pennes against' 'hard as railroad steel'.

I had to leave it halfway to get to a store before it closed. I couldn't wait to get back to finish it. That's the sign of a Really Good story.

I seriously recomend reformatting it (new paragraph each time a new person speaks), and sending it to a couple of publishers or magazines that do short stories.

T-rump might see heaven, just for a little bit
Just how ever long it takes for Jesus to spit.

Music page
www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm?bandid=707030