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TV Drama
by Raymond Byabazaire - 08/31/26 09:46 AM
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Weeks
by Gary E. Andrews - 08/29/26 12:08 AM
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Max Ceddo
by Gary E. Andrews - 08/27/26 11:50 PM
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 20
Casual Observer
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Casual Observer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 20 |
Hi Kitty,
You have a good idea there,
on vs 1, maybe dropping the word 'that' altogether would give it more punch if you are going for a strong woman getting stronger style country songOn vs 2 changing "only" to "or till death do us part".
V3, changing "when" to "If I fade into a memory".
Our whole lives are just the start
But I will wait for you to join me
And you will always have my heart. All of the underlined words at the end dont go with the song for me, I think if you would write in more words of warning to this man instead of insuring him you'll be around for him it will be much stronger as a song..Maybe telling him that "You can have a place in my heart but my heart and mind do not agree, my heart may belong to you boy but someday Im gonna be free"...
If you like those words, you have my heart to use em...LOL
Love and Hugs and Best Wishes to You!
Christine Hagar 
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