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Imaginin’ (Neil Cotton)

~C
We hear the whistle of the train
See it ramble round the bend
We smell the cattle cars,
Feel the ground vibratin’
We taste the black smoke
And begin imaginin’

Who has never stood by the tracks and marveled at the sound
Of the clickity clack of steel wheels travelling round & round
If there are any who missed, that rhythmic experience
They won’t understand how trains, intoxicate each sense

I’ve closed my eyes and seen hobos jumping on board
Heard songs of the freedom slaves escaping the Civil War
Felt the club of railway cops busting convicts on the run
Caught the scent of mountain pines begging travelers to come

We hear the whistle of the train
See it ramble round the bend
We smell the cattle cars,
Feel the ground vibratin’
We taste the black smoke
And begin imaginin’

Johnny, Merle, Hanks and Jimmy before them
Wrote of the romance behind the big engines

We hear the whistle of the train
See it ramble round the bend
We smell the cattle cars,
Feel the ground vibratin’
We taste the black smoke
And begin imaginin’

Hi Neil.
This one has possibilities.
I think the chorus at the start lays the foundation but the first verse is where the imaginin' should start.

Maybe talk about the workers building the tracks, visitors at Christmas, robberies etc.
The second verse is spot on though.

Vic

Thanks Vic....will consider your suggestions...no music yet so it's not in stone.
I wrote it V1 C V2 so V1 was more of an intro...maybe I should go back to that.

Hello Neil
A great start and theme if you're like me and love train songs.Not so sure about the line with rhythmic experience but it's well worth developing this and I'll try and offer some ideas soon as
Travis

Neil.
I think you should keep the chorus where it is as it sets the scene, then rewrite the first verse to include more imaginings.

Vic

I've taken liberties with your lyric Neil lol

Hear the whistle from the train
as it ramble's around the bend
Smell the crowded cattle cars,
Feel the ground vibratin’
Get a taste of that black smoke
to start your mind imaginin’

Tell me! Ever stood by the tracks and marveled at the sound
Of the clickity clack of steel wheels travelling round & round?
Watched them lanterns swing,see the engineer take full control
give a blast on his 'ole whistle that would waken long dead souls
Travis

Hi Neil, like the others here, I feel this has possibilities. My only nit is saying "we". I'd rather say "I" or not as all, as Travis has suggested. Keep refining this one. I think it has potential.

Hey Travis and Betty will be on this in some detail soon. Your suggestions are being considered ...trust me...much appreciated.