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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Top 10 Poster
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OP
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325 |
Time After Time
As i hold this photograph
Through my sadness i laugh
Time,sure takes its sweet time
Your smile brings a tear
I'm wishing you were here
Time,sure takes its sweet time
They say time is a healer,it's a waiting game
Soon everything,will be just fine
But time is a dealer,and he's selling me only pain
Time after time
Everything that i do
Refers back to me and you
Time,sure takes its sweet time
My world slowly turns
My heart it still yearns
Time,sure takes its sweet time
I dread another day of missing you
And i pray that tomorrow,this pain will subdue
Then time will finally take me,out of these blues
They say time is a healer,it's a waiting game
Soon everything,will be just fine
But time is a dealer,and he's selling me only pain
Time after time
Last edited by Michael LeBlanc; 04/25/15 05:30 PM.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 6,916 Likes: 9
Top 40 Poster
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Top 40 Poster
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 6,916 Likes: 9 |
Really sad one from you Mike.
I like "Time sure takes it's sweet time". Nice.
Vic
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,177
Top 500 Poster
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Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,177 |
The title makes me think of the Cyndi Luper classic but that's ok. She doesn't have a copyright on the hook.
Your chorus is perfect. It couldn't be any better IMO.
Your verses though could be.
I see a few redundancies like the tears in verse 1, and then you mention it again in the next set of lines. Need to only mention it once.
There are words here that I'd stray from using because I find they are overused but they work for this and you'd have to find a whole new rhyme scheme to rewrite it.
I can feel the singers pain so this was a good write overall, Mike.
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Top 10 Poster
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OP
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325 |
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,876 Likes: 86
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,876 Likes: 86 |
I guess we're both on a melancholy journey this week Mike. Great lyrics for sad ballad. Best, John 
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
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yeah Aaron,i knew someone would mention Luaper so i did have "Time Takes It s Sweet Time" but i thought that was too long so i went back to my first thought.I changed one of those "tears",hope that helped.I appreciate your time and thoughts Aaron.Mike
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,177
Top 500 Poster
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Top 500 Poster
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,177 |
Have you heard Gary Allan - Life Ain't Always Beautiful? If you haven't you should check it out. Really sad song. Similar to yours a bit.
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Top 10 Poster
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OP
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325 |
thanx a lot John,it comes with the rain i guess.Mike
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
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OP
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Posts: 13,325 |
hey Aaron,i went and checked out Gary's song,i can see a little relation to it.I don't get his video though,as usual,this video doesn't seem to have anything to do with his song to me.Mike
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 7,712
Top 30 Poster
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Top 30 Poster
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 7,712 |
Good one, Michael. I've come to not believe in photographs because people change while pictures do not. We end up relating more to pictures than we do people. The only way to maintain a relationship is to contantly evolve with it.
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Top 10 Poster
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OP
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jan 2005
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i understand Jim but the person they are singing about has passed away so all there are are photographs and memories.I appreciate your visit!Mike
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