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*Old Man Brooks*

A Long trip down south to bury old man Brooks
He was ninety five still baitin’ them hooks
The river is gonna miss that old man

I learned a lot sittin' on that river bank
Common sense and stories I’ll never forget
How to be a better man

I remember him saying
Hope’s a lot like praying
If you do right it’ll come back to you

Put your trust in faith he often said
The man upstairs wrote those words in red
You got to believe in something you can’t see

That’s the gospel .....according to me

I passed a sign that brought him back,
Farmer with a fork on an old hay stack
Saying grace with folded hands
Home made pie in the ole lunch sack

Tote’n fishing poles wearing old straw hats
Corn cob pipes, bibs that button up the back
Floatin’ on the river, sittin’on the bank
You ain’t lived without memories like that

When I left the church I followed the tracks
To the old farm house with a pond in back
When I looked in I saw his face

He was still saying
Hope’s a lot like praying
If you do right it’ll come back to you

I passed a sign that brought him back,
Farmer with a fork on an old hay stack
Saying grace with folded hands
Home made pie in the ole lunch sack

Tote’n fishing poles wearing old straw hats
Corn cob pipes, bibs that button up the back
Floatin’ on the river, sittin’on the bank
You ain’t lived without memories like that

No you aint lived
You aint lived
Without memories like that

2023 CBF

This one is close to being finished....your thoughts

It looks like a 'recitation' style, spoken word in parts. The 'narrator' strings together the memories and images and it seems to work.

In poetry, a title like "Old Man Brooks" works well enough. In Song, it is more likely that the last Line of the Chorus, "Memories Like That" would be more appropriate. It's the Line left ringing in their ears as the Chorus ends, the Line that is emphasized in the Coda, a third Repeat.

Repeating THE Hook, the title, a minimum of three times is common.

That makes a lot of sense Gary. I'll be the 1st to admit I know nothing about song structure. I'm downloading that sort of thing and trying to put it to use. I have more time now. Everything I've did up to this point was spur of the moment kind of things. Wrote within 1/2 hour kept the 1st draft sat down and recorded a rough demo, (1 take) I've wrote lyrics in the bathroom at work, lunch breaks so on so forth. Plan on spending more time with each one from now on. I have somewhat of a melody worked out for this but not sure I like it. If you have a moment, please arrange the lyrics according to your last line.
I'd like to see if I understand. "THE Hook, the title, a minumum of three times is common."

Poet Nikki Giovanni says, "I will pull my car over, to 'receive' the 'incoming' poem!"

Receive 'when' it comes, 'wherever' you are.

I'd 'label' your Structure this way:

*Old Man Brooks* Copyright 2323, by CFB


(Verse I)
A Long trip down south to bury old man Brooks
He was ninety five still baitin’ them hooks
The river is gonna miss that old man

I learned a lot sittin' on that river bank
Common sense and stories I’ll never forget
How to be a better man

I remember him saying
Hope’s a lot like praying
If you do right it’ll come back to you

Put your trust in faith he often said
The man upstairs wrote those words in red
You got to believe in something you can’t see

(Pre-Chorus 'lift')
That’s the gospel .....according to me

(Chorus)
I passed a sign that brought him back,
Farmer with a fork on an old hay stack
Saying grace with folded hands
Home made pie in the ole lunch sack

Tote’n fishing poles wearing old straw hats
Corn cob pipes, bibs that button up the back
Floatin’ on the river, sittin’on the bank
You ain’t lived without memories like that

(Verse II)
When I left the church I followed the tracks
To the old farm house with a pond in back
When I looked in I saw his face

He was still saying
Hope’s a lot like praying
If you do right it’ll come back to you

I passed a sign that brought him back,
Farmer with a fork on an old hay stack
Saying grace with folded hands
Home made pie in the ole lunch sack

Tote’n fishing poles wearing old straw hats
Corn cob pipes, bibs that button up the back
Floatin’ on the river, sittin’on the bank
You ain’t lived without memories like that

(Coda)
No you aint lived
You aint lived
Without memories like that

2023 CBF

Thanks a bunch, I'm really leaning towards renaming this to "Memories Like That"