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Kind of a pop rock ballad, thanks for the listen. Dave

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/8/davesmurraymusic.htm

V1
You were first all the time
when your heart was mine to love you
You were last one in line
when it came to lovin' me
I gave you all that I had
but the story is sad to remember
Guess I can't change the way
of the things that had to be

Chorus
Only love can break your heart
Only love can break your heart
Only love can break your heart
And only love can mend mine

V2
What we had at one time
was really a crime to be wasted
It was never the same
when you felt you needed change
You had to be on your own
just to see if alone you could make it
But you lost more than you had to win
when leavin' me

Chorus

Howdy Dave,

I gave your song a listen and liked it quite a bit. Your voice and style took me back to those power-ballet groups from the 80's. I wish I could sing like that. Thanks for sharing.

Joseph

You have a great voice ! The song production is top-notch.

Thank you very much Joseph and beatgirls, your comments are greatly appreciated.

Dave

Hi Dave,
Great song, arrangement, playing, singing. Lyrically, however, Neil Young (author of "It's only Love Can Break Your Heart") might have something to say about the chorus!

Here's a humble suggestion, free of charge:

"Only love can hurt so bad
Only love can hurt so bad
Only love can hurt so bad
But only love heals my heart"

Like Joseph, I too enjoyed the power-ballet groups - all that leaping! And those gorgeous tutus! (Sorry, Joseph, couldn't resist it! I know you meant ballad )
Bob

Check out my latest "Love" at
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/3/boblesliemusic.htm

Hey Bob, thanks for the comments and the suggestion, I'll check it out. Appreciate it.

Dave

Dave,
Some great pop/rock here. You're quit a style master to produce this kind of material. I especially enjoyed your vocals on this.

Bob Leslie's suggestion:
"Only love can hurt so bad"
might be worth looking into!

Otherwise, great sounding power ballad!

Michael B.

Thank you Michael, I greatly appreciate it.

Dave

Hi Dave...Well that darn Bob just may be right again. THe chorus is maybe a bit too similar to Neil Young's. I think you can go somewhere on the lines of what Bob suggests. Just look for different ways to say exactly what you wish to say!
The music and your vocals are fabulous. The production superb! All in all a very good song and demo, I think!!!

R.T.

Thanks R.T., I really appreciate your comments and will look into revamping that chorus section.

Dave

Dave,

Your voice and the entire production is top notch. The chorus is absolutely the downfall of this song. I't just comes off as being lazy and not working at it.
simple:
I would throw the the whole chorus except the title and focus on the Title only.
"Only Love" can start the chorus and finish it as a hook..

Example:

Only Love is there in my darkness
finding the light from above
Mending with holy forgiveness
Please come find me again..my.. Only Love.

Really tag the end of teh chorus with ONLY LOVE.

Your voice is so good you could sing about anything and make it sound good but you can't pull off the weak chorus.

DAvid

Really nice song, Dave.

I don't see the chorus as being lazy, and I know you are trying to drive home your hook. But I also think you can improve on it. Here's a way to do it without changing very much at all, plus it gives you the benefit of an end rhyme:

Only love can break your heart.
Only love can outlast time.
Only love can break your heart
And only love can mend mine.

Or something to that effect.
Good job.


------------------
Chris

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/6/chrisgarrettmusic.htm

Thanks David and Chris, I appreciate your comments and suggestions. I will do some restructuring of the chorus section and see how it works out. Thanks again.

Dave