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We had the worktape posted here a few weeks ago...This is our full demo. See what you think. Thanks so much for listening.

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=9518008



BEFORE
©2010 Janice Hopkins, Carolyn Taylor White, Tonya Rogers
Female/Contemporary Country

Verse 1
He called to say, I’ll be a little late
And, honey I’m real sorry
I said, that’s okay, I’ve got stops to make
After work, so don’t you worry

Lift 1
Somethin’ in his voice didn’t seem quite right
So I headed my car down to exit 5
Found his truck outside the local pub
Where we’d first met and fell in love
But that was before. . .

Chorus
A thirty year loan on a house of our own
Before two kids were finally grown
Before all the bills
Took romantic thrills. . .away
Before our dreams began to fade
Day by day. . .
‘Till it wasn’t like . . . Before. . .

Verse 2
Saw him with her as I snuck in the bar
As she was leaning his way
When she touched his arm, I saw red in the dark
‘Till the moment I heard him say

Lift 2
Yeah, I come here from time to time
Just to reminisce ‘bout when it was right
See this photo of my wife and kids
It’s nice rememberin’ how she loved me then
But that was before. . .

Repeat Chorus

Bridge
I found out, I’m the only woman that he lives for
And when he finally walked in our back door
I gave him a wink . . . an ole’ familiar grin
Then I led him to a place he’d been. . .
Before. . .

Repeat Chorus

Mmmm, mm, mm…..Before

Oooohh, this came out nice. Hook's already bangin' around inside
my noggin......I would have downloaded it but no button.
......I'll be back..........Gus

Gus....thanks so much...so glad that it's bangin' around...and BTW....I just changed that download opt. for ya'....thanks so much for giving this a listen for us...so glad you approve.

Jan

Janice
I like everything about this song. The lyric is well crafted, every line in it leads to the title, it's a great story. The music Prosody is perfect and the demo very well done. The vocal is right on.

But
It's an old story. been done many times
Having said that I guess it really doesn't matter. Like they say it's all been written.

But you might have said it different and better. It's a great angle.

Good job on this one.

I love this! Killer all around, gals. Placing the hook in the lifts works very well to break the cliché of always starting out with the big cahuna in the chorus, IMO.

Twisting the story into the positive towards the end works really well, in this case also!

If anything, the melody (and maybe the whole demo) may sound a little 80'ies, and in the first few listens the chorus sounds a little off, due to what we have come to expect of these types of songs. In technical terms this is absolutely not contemporary country, but traditional, due to the groove of the song.

But this aspires to be a classic song, of which I think it succeeds in, and then these things may not be a dealbreaker.

I would love to hear a Martina, Lee Ann or Reba add this to their repertoire! One for the traditionalists, for sure, but a great one!

If we should vote for best lyric of the year in here, I would definitely nominate this.

Gosh Bill...thanks a whole lot for your comments....so happy that it works for you...means even more to me because I wrote this melody and believe me, I am not a great guitar player at all....but I hear things in my head...and this is what I heard.

Hope we did manage to say it a bit differently.

Thanks, Bill

Jan

Mags...yeah, I hear it as more Trad. as well...we want to pitch it to LeeAnn Womack....to me, she does the Trad. stuff best.

This is one of my first attempts at a melody. It's totally what I heard when I was working on it....It's simple, but that's what I do on the guitar the best...HA.

Can't thank you enough for all you have said here, Mags. Makes me think that maybe I'll write a few more...LOL.

We all appreciate that you approve of this one, Mags.

Jan

Yes this one turns a negative into a positive which is a good thing.

Are you willing to share with us who did the demo?

Colin

Colin...this was done at Frank Michels studios...nashville.

Thanks for giving it a listen. Glad you like the positivity...we do too.

We appreciate you stopping by,

Jan

Hey Janice,

It's a nicely produced demo for sure. Clean and crisp. Good sound.

Not too sure about the lyrics and the general theme however. I think it may alienate half your audience.

I've seen much better work from you. How about a rethink ?

cheers, niteshift

You know that chorus sounds really good -- at I think you did a mighty fine job on the melody. I commented on the lyrics before, so I won't re-hash that part.

Nice little male addition on the chrous harmony. I rarely try and critique a pro demo, so I'll just say "sounds good to me".

Kevin

Niteshift....only half? Well, guess in that case that we would just have to put up with the other half's money....HA.

No....really, I appreciate your opinion. I put them all into the mix and in the end, I guess I go with the majority....and that is yet to be added up....but, it all helps.

Thanks for stopping by and giving it a listen...

Jan

Janice
There was a song done with this theme not to long ago but for the life of me I can't remember who did it. All I can remember is he/she thought the other was cheating but it turned out to be something like this.
Maybe the fact I can't remember means it wasn't very good and this one is better. I will remember this one

Bill....one of the best things that can be said to a songwriter is....I will remember this one. You just said that and I thank you....we all do....that's what songwriting is all about....saying something that someone will remember in some way. So thanks for that.

Jan

Janice, I don't get around to critiquing nearly as much as I'd like, but I have to say this is my absolute favorite lyric of yours. I know it's probably been said before, but so has "I love you", and I keep repeating that old saw all the time, for good reason. Excellent, excellent lyric.

I'm admittedly lousy at making suggestions for modern country music...my instincts always run in more alt-country directions, if not outright nostalgia, but this definitely works for the song.

Good luck with this one!

Ladies,
I love this. Really ought to get cut. Think I'll download it.

Have fun,
John

Janice if this was your first melody, then for goodness sake don't stop! Very good job all the way around. I love surprise endings, especially happy ones.. This one begs for a complimentary video. You go girl!

Best,
Lynn

Janice,

Great lyric, very good song, was happy to listen!

Tammy

You are totally selfcontained now, Janice. Lyrics and melodies is everything in a song. Thats the reward of all your hard work. A congratulation is in place! Now you just need to listen to the melodies in contemporary country to capture the differences between trad. and contemporary. Then you'll be a free woman (to do what you want) :-)

Mags, I will never be self-contained, as you say.....and I'm not sure that I'd want to be. I need other talented people to work with to make me the best that I can be. We all have our strengths and our weaknesses. At this point in my life, I think I realize what is on both of those lists for me. I try to play to my strengths, and at the same time I try to constantly learn and grow and stretch myself beyond my comfort zone. That is tough for me sometimes, but I still try to do it. Writing is really who I am. It's as simple as that. But, I wouldn't be doing what I am today without the constant help and inspiration that I get from so many talented people that I have gotten the chance to work with. ....yourself highly included on that list....and I thank you always for that.

Jan

Love the lyric, melody is good but I have to agree on the 80ish sound. Sounds very much like a Barbara Mandrell or Dolly song. Not sure if a tougher vocal would make a difference, but it is a demo, so don't let any of that stop you.

(yes, I know, it's really me,in the print!!),

Hi Caroline.....nice to hear from you and thanks for weighing in on this one. I think that a different vocal could change this up, but I'm not sure that I'd want to. Sorry it seems dated to you...you could be right....but that just may mean that we would pitch it to Reba or LeeAnn, etc. for a more Trad. sound...and yeah, I wouldn't turn either of them down.

Hope all is well with you. We don't hear much from you anymore and that is sad....so glad to see you're back.

Thanks,

Jan

Actually, in country the 80'ies are not that dated. Most of the current southern rock type of country comes with a 70'ies sound. There are just a few that does the contemporary pop stuff, Carrie Underwood and somewhat Keith Urban to name the most prominent..

This is really the kind of song I like to hear again and again.. a true beauty!

Great song Janice
Sounds ready to go.
I'm a sucker for a good story and you had me @ I said, that’s okay, I’ve got stops to make after work, so don’t you worry.

well Done...

Nelson

Hold on, I didn't say I didn't like it, I didn't say it couldn't get cut, and for the record, I love Dolly and Barbara! Watched both on tv and listened to the records almost daily. (Yes, I said records) I simply think it needs a tad updating on the instrumentation (is that a word?) That's all! I did enjoy it, even if that Hopkins woman was involved (hehehe)(don't go taking offense, newbies, we are friends)

Anyway, dated is good and not so good, but I would just like to let you guys know that my next vocal will sound dated and when someone points it out I expect you folks to take up for me with the same protective coating you're giving this lady!

Los banos, Ms. Jan!

You are TOO funny, Miss C...as always, but thanks for clarifying your position...I appreciate you stopping back by with your usual brand of good humor.

Jan

Mags,

Thanks, once again for all of your helpful comments on this one and always for your encouragement and trust.

It's appreciated beyond words,

Jan

Hi Jan,

Great sounding production and although she's not Heather, the vocalist did a fine job. Having the male vocal doing harmony was a nice touch in lift 2. Good to hear a cheatin' song without the actual cheatin! Well done.

Ricki

Hi Janice. Congratulations on a very fine song--the lyrics, the melody, and production make a very nice package indeed. I listened to the work tape again, though, and think Heather captured the emotion of the song a wee bit better. JMO, of course. Traditional? Contemporary? Whatever. A good song is a good song. And this one is very good. All the best in pitching it!

Cheers,
Scott

Thanks so much, Ricki. Yes, we were happy to have that male harmony at that particular spot....so glad that it worked for you as well. Yes, no one is our Heather....but this one came with the pkg. Hope she got the point across for us.

So glad that you listened to this NON-cheating one....HA.

Jan

Excellent song, why do you call it a demo, sounds finished to me.
What a great country voice you have and the lyrics are very "feel good".

I am desperately trying to find something wrong or bad with it and can't, "heavy metal" fans won't like it much is the best I can do.

Great song, I see no reason why it should not do well for you.

Hi there Puddleglum,

You asked why we call it a demo....well, because it was done for pitching purposes, sung by a hired demo singer. But we really appreciate that you think it sounds finished, because that is the goal here in the states now....the demo must sound "Radio ready". They won't listen to much less. Those days are gone.

Heavy metal fans won't like it much!!....HA...HA. Now is that the best you can do? Darn it, I heard that Led Zeppelin was going out on tour again, trying to make a "comeback"......now we are sunk! LOL

All kidding aside....thanks so much for the encouragement on this one and for giving it a listen for us.

Jan

Nelson,

Somehow I managed to get my responses out of sync here...I'm sorry about that.

Thank you so much for giving this one a listen for us.... we're happy that the storyline worked for you.

Thanks so much for the encouragement on this one. It is very much appreciated.

Jan

Scott....thanks so much for giving a listen and a response on this one. Yes, Heather sure can put the emotion into a song, can't she....but this studio demo was a pkg. deal, and I think that we're happy with it for pitching purposes.

We're not quite sure where it fits in at this point, it would depend on the final cut's instrumentation, etc.

Thanks so much for the thumbs up....it is much appreciated.

Jan

Janice....another very nice demo....good luck....I still like Dance In the Rain....Bob

Thanks Bob....Hey, we haven't seen you around these parts lately....where have you been keeping yourself?

Thanks again, so much for always liking Dance in the Rain....and thanks for giving this one a listen for us.

Hope all is well with you,

Jan

WOW !! WOW!!

Wonderful! Everthing about this song feels right (nice twist).

Bernd

Hi Janice, Carolyn,Taylor and Tonya Rogers..

Me and Helen had a listen and thought it was a great song. The singer got it spot on IOO% and the music was right.

You know I'm fussy on demo's Janice and if this was mine I would be proud of it and 100% happy.

well done you all

God Bless Roy and Helen

Mark, Well it seems that I have once again, gotten out of sync with my responses here, so please excuse me for that. But, Mark...all of the comments, especially coming from someone whose work I so admire, means so much to me. This was one of my very first attempts at a melody....boy, it's amazing how much a year of guitar lessons have helped me get out what has always been in my head each time that I've written a lyric. It is such a relief to be able to do that and add to the ways that I can express myself.
I had two great co-writers on this, that made the lyric side of it easy, believe me. We always seem to be on the same page as to where to take it.

I thank you....we all thank you for liking this one and for telling us so. It is very encouraging. We're so glad that it works for you.

Jan

John,

We are all honored that you'd want to download this one....and happy that you like it.

Thanks for giving it a listen and for encouraging us. We all appreciate that so much.

Life is fun....

Jan

Lynn,

Your comments were very encouraging and I thank you for them. It was one of my first melodies (maybe about the 4th)....but I believe it was the first one that we took to full demo....so this was a bit of a milestone for me and we are all so happy that it has been so well received.

Carolyn had sent me this lyric start and asked me to work on it with her. I heard the melody immediately. I loved working on this project. Carolyn and Tonja made it so much fun and so rewarding.

We can't thank you enough for helping to push us onward with this one. It's so appreciated, believe me.

Jan

Tammy,

Thank you so very much for giving this a listen. So glad that you liked it and it seems to work for you.

Thanks from all of us...

Jan

Dan....Well, you are a man of few words, LOL....but, believe me, I am more than happy to take the two that you gave us!!

We appreciate that you gave this one a listen....but did you like it? HA...just kidding!

Thanks so much, Dan....as always

Jan

Hi Jan...

My third listen in two days! As hard as I sometimes try, I rarely can find fault in yiour writing. This is great as is. Sounds like a great song for Sara Evans. Would have been absolutely perfect for Lorrie Morgan when she was still a hot ticket.

This is great..period!

Alan

Alan,

Thank you...thank you....thank you...(that's for all three times that you've listened) You always humble me with your words....it is so very appreciated.

Sara Evans is a VERY good thought, Alan. To tell you the honest truth, I was thinking of Lorrie Morgan the whole time while I was writing this melody. She remains one of my all time favorites...still a hot ticket or not, I would still be honored to have her sing one of mine...anytime she wants.

Thank you for always encouraging me so very much. You have no idea how much it means. The guitar playing is only about a year old now....but I do love my Alvarez....I call her Juanita and she and I have a pretty darned good relationship and we meet up for an hour or two every day.....just to sing and play a few.

Hope all is well for you, Alan

Jan

Bernd,

Thanks so much for giving this a listen for us. We're happy that is all seems to work for you and are glad that you liked the ending.

We appreciate you stopping by and taking the time.

Jan

Roy and Helen,

Thanks so much for giving this a listen for the three of us. We're glad that it is working for you. Our producer did a good job for us, and we are happy with it and all of the positive response that we have gotten so far.

We appreciate your comments very much.

Jan

Hi Janice

Wow, I'm hooked, and I'm on my second listen now, I absolutely love it, big congratulations to all.

Great write, and tell Debora, she nailed it, love listening to her voice. Very Catchy, great HOOK.

Hugs Michele

Michele,

Thanks so very much for listening to our new one. So glad that you like it.

Yes, Debora sang her heart out for us on this one.

Happy that you liked the hook.

Thank you so much for the nice comments, Michele. They are always appreciated.

Jan