This is more the rock side of country, if it's country at all! I had the riff forever then it finally all came together years later. Thanks for the listen/comments.

Zeek

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Even If The World Goes Dark

Verse 1
Saturday night on the Bayou
River Queen cutting through a moonless sky
Hair whipping everywhere around you
Come a little bit closera--guess what's on my mind

Verse 2
Flickering lights in the distance
Summer rain washing away the years
I thought it was a find night for kissing
Then it sounded like hell was breaking out up here

Chorus
Even if the world goes dark
I got your pretty little face inside my heart
And if it never spins again
I'll dance you all around the room instead
This love ain't never gonna stop
Even if the world goes dark

Verse 3
Everybody running and hiding
Baby we know nothing don't last too long
In a minute the stars'll be shining
Whatever comes honey it don't matter at all

Chorus
Even if the world goes dark
I got your pretty little face inside my heart
And if it never spins again
I'll dance you all around the room instead
This love ain't never gonna stop
Even if the world goes dark


Bridge
I get all tangled up just thinking 'bout you girl
I can't help myself I'm falling hard again

Chorus

hi zeek, REALLY like the music for this. it's got that sound that i personnally can get carried away with. i don't think the lyrical hook is as strong though, just my opinion. it took me a minute to get the "if it never spins again" to mean the earth. after i got it the rest "i'll spin you around instead" became understandable. verse 2 doesn't work for me at all,what does any of that have to do with the rest of the story? it seems like filler, and does not give me solid information ie. where is "up here",is the singer seeing this girl on the top deck of a river boat? thing is, these lyrics donot convey that fact well enough to give the listener that image without some thot. the first two lines of verse one start to tell a story, then the last two lines, just don't seem to carry over to a useful image that is strong enough to get a visual of the girl. ok, just read verse one again. "river queen" is the woman not a "river boat" but that's what i mean, i wasn't sure what you were describing and in a three or four minute time frame it's important to get the information out crystal clear from the get go. this does feel like a country song to me, country rock, and in country songs you want to say it REAL clear unlike in a bob dylan song or something like that. so i think this could be a great song but you need to work on the story and the images. i wouldn't take the time to say all this except that i really like the music and feel it needs better lyrics. hope this is useful to you and it is intended to be helpful and offered in a good spirit, loved the music.

peace,dmk

Zeek...talented guy....first one of yours I've listened to...you write music at a level where I'll give it to you straight, cut to the chase so to speak...if I were trying to make it better next take i would do a lyric rewrite so there is more of something for the listener to be drawn in by- the first 2 verses don't do that, the 3rd lacks something as well...yea verse rewite in order all the way around...the chorus is great- write to that...literally make every line point toward that chorus...music has a good feel- the riff you spoke about writing from is strong enough to carry a song if the other parts aren't detracting from it by being weaker than it...ain't it a bitch, ya get a great part and they all gotta be great- least common denominator rule...
arrangement is very good...again....lyrics/verses rewrite...i would cut on out about 20 seconds earlier...be well...write on...moker

Moker/dmk--great thoughts, ones I've felt myself. I had the riff/chorus forever and failed to tie the chorus theme to the verse lyrics. Melody is in place--just have to do it!

Zeek

Zeek, You've got a good title and hook: Even if the world goes dark. And the song rocks. The kind that you can hear shaking the walls and blasting out into a Honky Tonk parking lot in Anywhere, USA. I dunno about the lyrics. I wouldn't worry about them too much. The music drives this song. The lyrics are just along for the ride. If you can sharpen them, fine. If not, that's okay too. Good job.

Nat, I listened to this yesterday but then had to go fix dinner, so I thought I would come back to it. I like the music a lot..the chorus is catchy, but I am not sure about the end of the world scenerio...it makes it not as relateable to me...ya know how couples are struggling in this day and time, jobs, forclosures etc...maybe come up with ways that one's world can feel dark and how being in love and finding strength in that helps you see the light once again. I hate to tear at your lyric like this, but I feel with this wonderful hook and music....it deserves a bit better story, and then I think you will have a hit. big time. good luck! --Kim
edit...I just came back and saw that some others seemed to feel the same about the lyrics, so I would not let it get you down but whip this bad boy into shape and you have a winner!!!

It was meant to be where they were on a boat, the River Queen. Thunderstorm coming like they do so often down there, rain, hell breaking loose--the thunderstorm. Everybody (tourists maybe) running around, but they know storms pass quickly...almost a metaphor for life's troubles. I know it needs to be clearer but I'm not gonna spell it out and risk losing the imagery I have. Maybe a few tweaks will hopefully do it. That said with the verses, does the chorus make more sense?

Even through darkest times, not end of the world stuff, he's got her heart. Even if the world came to a stop, he'd make up for it by dancing her around the room instead--all metaphors. Clearer?

Zeek