|
10 members (texritter, Fdemetrio, KyleCrawford, Sunset Poet, bennash, Gary E. Andrews, Everett Adams, 3 invisible),
24,967
guests, and
5,958
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.
By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
TV Drama
by Raymond Byabazaire - 08/31/26 09:46 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 187
Serious Contributor
|
Serious Contributor
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 187 |
Love it! Love. It.
Great job. Wonderfully refreshing!
"I know a guy who says he wakes up with his eyes closed.
What does he see?"
Intriguing lines to open with, and I like how you paraphrased it for verse 2.
The lyric has a "flow of consciousness" feel to it. Except that it isn't, you've clearly crafted it quite carefully.
I like the little variations you've got in there. Small things like the emphasis on hear in "sometimes I hear him sing" and larger ones like the chord change for "Is he living right - seems to be"
And overall the message about being an example by your deeds rather than your words, resonates with me.
Loved it!
|
|
|
|
We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.
|
|
|
Forums118
Topics128,949
Posts1,185,398
Members21,480
| |
Most Online236,505
Jul 1st, 2026
|
|
|
"No matter how much you legally protect a turd, it's still a turd" -Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
|
|
