Keith, this one shows potential. I'll let others nit pick on the lyric. I'm more interested in how a lyric sounds WITH music. Without it a lyric IMO is just a "lyric poem." That's not to dismiss lyrics only folks but I never post a lyric myself if I don't have music to go with it because it's completely out of context and many suggestions people make for the lyric are cleared up in the full production.

Anyway, good job. I could come up with a head tune to it as I read it which is a good sign to me. Most of the time that doesn't come to me unless I'm collaborating and have to figure something out. Well, that's not really completely true. I never collaborate unless the lyric suggests a melody or different possible melodies. I take it you are also a composer. Do you have a SoundClick site? I may have already been there if you do but with all the new names since I came back aboard it's hard to keep up with who is whom.

Your Bud,

Steve


I'm the only person here who is not unique.