|
5 members (Fdemetrio, texritter, Michael W. Brown, Bill Draper, 1 invisible),
71,336
guests, and
5,738
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.
By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
|
|
SHINE
by Rob B. - 08/20/26 05:03 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 2,448
Top 200 Poster
|
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 2,448 |
Michele, This is nice, the chorus is quite catchy good job it's well produced very good singer The main issue I have with the song is the story which is: you left me shattered my heart i'm trying to get over it If I were writing to this title I would have made the singer look better, gone with a girl power theme you were a jerk so i dumped you you're begging for me to take you back that's never going to happen GET OVER IT the lyric spends a lot of space on jig saw puzzle references I think it would be better to show actual specific images from the relationship like "She Can't Be Really gone" http://www.romantic-lyrics.com/lc46.shtmlhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-VC8Kg1B5lMMy lyric writing tips might be helpful to you: http://www.jpfolks.com/forum/ubbthreads.php/ubb/showflat/Number/537816+ read each one + compare your lyric to what the tip suggests + use my tips like a checklist + Identify parts of your song that could benefit from a rewrite wish you the best with your songwriting Ande
Ande Rasmus sen Ande R a s m u s s e n@aol.com Ande R a s m u s s e n.com SongRamp.com/ande MySpace.com/anders
Texas Grammy Gov 06-08 grammy.com/Texas
Editor Of "Inspirations for Songwriters" SongWriterBlog.com Explore the message archive
To receive IFS SEND an EMPTY email to: difs-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
|
|
|
|
We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.
|
|
|
Forums118
Topics128,888
Posts1,185,227
Members21,479
| |
Most Online236,505 Jul 1st, 2026
|
|
|
"Learn the "tried and true" rules, then break them with premeditated malice!" -Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
|
|