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... a broken-hearted fool's song...

Thanks for listening. Comments welcomed/encouraged.


LUCKY FOR ME

i see clearly you're not here
it's written on these bare walls
i can hear the emptiness
echo through these halls
my arms figured out what this lonely's about
my hands reach and know what's wrong
but lucky for me, my heart doesn't know you're gone

lucky for me, my heart is on it's own
it's too blind to see that the rest of me
is standing here alone
if it ever learns you've slipped away
heaven knows there'd be hell to pay
lucky for me, my heart doesn't know you're gone

i watched you go, i heard "goodbye"
so i know we're through
but i can't break it to my heart
it would surely break in two
without you here to love
it'd have no reason to go on
lucky for me, my heart doesn't know you're gone

repeat chorus


Have at it.

floyd

Very nice but sad. Wish there was a glimmer of hope, ya know?

It is a sad song, but I like it. Plus, it's original. Best of luck.

Very pretty song, Floyd

Bill

Hi Floyd.
Fine song here and your usual excellent vocal.
My favourite part "lucky for me, my heart is on it's own
it's too blind to see that the rest of me
is standing here alone".
Arrangement wise, you could try a rhythm tacet on "alone" there so it leaves it waiting for the next part of the chorus.
Vic

Hi Floyd,

Such a beautiful performance.
Thanks for sharing.

Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

You really have a gorgeous country voice and the song is beautifully written and performed.

Kimberly

Hi Floyd,

This is heartbreakingly lovely.
Just lovely.

Lisa

Floyd--

This is one of your best--so down to earth and full of emotion--I've been in that room!

Mackie

Floyd, You're reaching deep and touching some raw emotions with this one. And your drawing out every bit of emotion with your phrasing and singing. You wrote a good one.

a good ol sad one Floyd,nice delivery and a real good write.Mike

Beautiful Floyd.

Nice chord progressions especially. I was thinking how I would love to hear a fairly mild "weeping type" guitar solo," but there are time constraints, so one idea that might work is when you sing the chorus the 2nd time, to hold on to the word (alone) and go "up" melodically--and as you're doing that, an electric guitar will play out the chorus melody, then you sing with the along with the solo on the last chorus line. (This is just an idea, and maybe not a great one, but might be worth experimenting to give a dramatic build toward this song's ending before capitulating.

I really enjoyed this, as usual a fine melody with sweet vocals.

steady-eddie.

Iggy - thanks for the listen. I kind of wanted this to stay in the no-hope place..

Theresa - thanks for that.

Bill - thanks for droppin' by!

Vic - appreciate that. Not sure I get what you are suggesting there by "rhythm tacet"...

Calvin - thank you...

Sorry, I means a rest for the rhythm section on that word "alone".
Vic

Just plain old nice Floyd. Just plain old good to listen to.
Doug

Hey Floyd,

That's just a classic piece of song writing mate. Sounds like an instant classic. The performance is spot on.

I'm lucky I don't drink Gin.

cheers, niteshift

This a beautiful piece, with a brilliantly creative concept, in the lyric. Clever and Original

Wonderful guitar work and smooth vocals.

To these amateur ears, it sounds great... production is clean as a whistle.

Hat's off to you

Real pretty tune Floyd! I like the chord progression and the feel of it. Nice singing too! I could honestly hear Gary Morris singing this one.

The dudes in Nashville are always telling me "Show me.. don't tell me" and you did just and did it well. But IMHO the last verse should do more of this to match the rest of a real good tune. I was playing around with something like..

I heard that screen door slam,
Watched your tail lights fade,
So there's no doubt we're through
but i can't bare to tell my heart
it would surely break in two
without you here to live for (I like "to love" too)
it'd have no reason to go on
lucky for me, my heart doesn't know you're gone

Great tune man! Keep em' comin' :-)
-S

Kimberly - I appreciate that.

Lisa - thank you.

Mackie - glad you liked it...

Dan - thanks for the kind words...

Mike - thanks, man..

eddie - thanks for the comments - and suggestions. I gave that a try - adding a guitar solo through the last part of the ending chorus - but did not find anything that felt right - nothing felt like it was adding something "special"... could be I just don't have that in me...

Vic - I tried that, too. It seemed "not quite right" (but I may be interpreting it incorrectly). But, again, I appreciate the suggestions...

Doug - thanks for that..

Geoff - what a very nice thing to say. I do appreciate it. (After that last incident, I had to give up gin, myself... I'll stick with the light beer...)

Floyd,
Wonderful song, singing, and overall presentation…Really enjoyed listening to that!
I hope this doesn't come across as nit picky; in your line:
my arms figured out what this lonely's about
I really felt like the word "this" was unnecessary and got in the way

Respectfully,
Aaron

Nelson - from a guy that I consider "clever and original" himself - I do appreciate such nice comments!

Steve - thanks for that. Appreciate the suggestions - I'll kick that around a bit...

Hi Floyd,

First of your songs I've heard and I gotta say--you have a wonderful voice for starters. Very nice recording as well--not to mention the lyrics,storyline is very heartfelt. Great job--I'll be looking for more. take care,
Roger

Marvelous Floyd,
very well done.

John

Man, that one will rip the paint right off your heart. Janice and I have referred to this type of tune as "heart songs" for years. And this is about as good as it gets. I can see a lone figure at a table peeling the label off a Miller Lite while this is playing (OK I stole that line).

Take all that and package it with the fj pro studio sound and a great vocal and out pops another stellar fj production.

Aaron - thanks... not "picky" at all... always appreciate thoughts from others. I get what you are saying there, but I wanted it to be "immediate and local" - as opposed to being a "big picture lonely" - am I explaining that well enough? "...this lonely.." right here, 'mine' as opposed to an understanding of 'loneliness as a whole'...

Roger - thanks, appreciate that...

John - thanks for the spin...

Bud - you're just way too kind there...

Floyd,

Flawless. Amazing as usual. Loved the guitar but most especially your vocal. Pure!

Dave

There is absolutely nothing wrong with this song. It's strong from every angle. The arrangement is top-notch, the lyrics are rich in great details and emotion and the vocal very powerful. You're the real deal Floyd and I loved it. Touching, emotional and perfectly conveyed.