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#611889 05/02/08 11:22 AM
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new traditional country demo for a female vocalist...

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6510396

Baby Talk
(c) Mar 2008, Rebecca Dale Peaden (BMI)/Moker Jarrett (ASCAP), Demo by Magicshackdemos.com (Jason Roller-Instruments,Teea Goans-Vocals)


I remember Mama saying
She never wanted a mansion on a hill
Cause the happiest times in her life
were rockin' us on the porch when we were little still

Chorus:

Talkin' baby talk
with so much love in every phrase
While she got us dressed - and combed our hair
She told us stories about the good ol' days
She'd fix our food and feed us
Then wipe our hands and face
And when evening came - tuck us in a warm bed
Knowing precious time had slipped away


Well I never understood that
Till I had a little toe-head of my own
Now I've got everything I need
behind these lace curtains of our country home

Chorus:

Talkin' baby talk
With so much love in every phrase
While I get her dressed - and comb her hair
I tell her stories about the old days
I fix her food and feed her
then wipe her hands and face
And when evening comes - tuck her in a warm bed
Knowing precious time has slipped away

Bridge:

My little girl's a mother now
And guess you could say I'm middle-aged
And my mama still rocks in her old chair
When I visit I spend most of the day

Chorus:

Talkin' baby talk
With so much love in every phrase
While I get her dressed - and comb her hair
I tell her stories about the old days
I fix her food and feed her
then wipe her hands and face
And when evening comes - tuck her in a warm bed
Knowing precious time has slipped away

Outtro:

time is slipping away...

Moker Jarrett #611948 05/02/08 01:52 PM
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Love this traditional country tune....nice production, really heartfelt lyrics. Love the fiddle so much...really needed in this one. I am well acquainted with probably one of the best fiddle players in west Michigan. She plays with my sons band...has a masters in music....when she plays violin...it makes you cry. I love to hear it in these types of tunes.

Well, no nits on this one....great sound.....

Jan



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Yes, this is another good one. I can't wait until I can tell folks that I knew Moker back when ...

I always like those "generational" songs. Keep writing and pitching, your time will come.

Kevin


"Good science comes in peer reviewed journals. Conspiracy theories come in YouTube videos. "
Kevin @ bandcamp: Crows Say Vee-Eh
Kevin Emmrich #612094 05/02/08 10:00 PM
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Janice, thanks again for your encouraging words...we have played this for a bluegrass publisher and he loves it, fingers crossed...thx...mj

Moker Jarrett #612099 05/02/08 10:13 PM
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Good one, I can hear Allison Kraus doing this one smile


http://www.soundclick.com/louistwinn

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." Thoreau
Louis #612102 05/02/08 10:32 PM
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Moker & Dale,

I think Louis hit the nail on the head...absolutley PERECT for Alison Kraus. Man, you guys are good! Will I still be able to stop by and visit ya in a few years...once your name is on the songwriter credits of so many videos on CMT & GAC?

Al

Two Singers #612104 05/02/08 10:53 PM
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Kevin, i am humbled by Your comments, i'm just hopin' somebody, somewhere, takes something we've done to the airplay level...it might help pay for this habit we've developed called demos...ha...thanks...mj

Moker Jarrett #612113 05/02/08 11:46 PM
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Hi Moker and Dale:

I left a post here but it didn't show up....

Man, I did not see that bridge and final chorus coming smile

Hit like a punch to the gut - nice one!

Scott

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Al, i'm going to be diggin' that time when it comes, whether it's you visitin' me or vice versa...i could care less about the rest of what's goin' on at that point, you're my friend and it's a day i look forward to...thanks for listening...i just e-mailed the pub that likes this with an Alison Krauss prod, hey why not...ha...mj

Moker Jarrett #612128 05/03/08 12:34 AM
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Moker,

Thanks! That goes both ways, too. And best of luck with the Alison Krauss punt, as well as any other possibilities for this great song.

Al

Last edited by Al David; 05/03/08 12:35 AM.
Two Singers #612210 05/03/08 10:54 AM
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Scott, that's the part that i love about this lyric, when mama's old , which if we are fortunate we all will be (i feel old some days now...ha), she is still surrounded by the same love she started the circle with...thanks for checking it out...Moker

Moker Jarrett #612211 05/03/08 11:00 AM
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Louis, my computer here at home won't play soundclick, i can't wait to listen to Your Jesus song...hey, You ever listen to Chuck Cannon? his cd God Shaped Hole, man i gotta make time to sit down and learn every tune on that thing,i think it's music You'd appreciate...thx for the Allison tip...mj

Moker Jarrett #612214 05/03/08 11:11 AM
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How appropriate w/Mother's Day fastly approaching. Sweet sentiment and I like the simplicity of this. Good job and nice listen. smile

Best,
Lynn


My Music at Soundclick
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=788266

~call it a blessing or call it a curse, but I see all of life in verse~

Always open to collaborations smile

God Bless Our Military!!!
Lynn Orloff #612215 05/03/08 11:13 AM
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Wow this is fantastic.. Great vocals and harmonies.. Love the Fiddle, or violin or whatever it is..

Tom Solanto #612235 05/03/08 11:49 AM
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well...this is real nice...but...I'm sorry, young man..there's just too many words..

I'll cite one line as an example the lace curtains of our country home..the words lace and country are gratuitous and cluttersome....just not necessary..they and many others take away from a simple and memorable melody..

There's a reason why great books, and films, and plays list editors among the most important credits.

You could use on here, young man.. I think it would turn a good idea into a really good song.

Great sounding demo, by the way

Bob

Last edited by Bob Young; 05/03/08 11:50 AM.
Bob Young (D) #612265 05/03/08 01:23 PM
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Hi Moker
Good traditional country sound.

But I think I have to agree with Bob. It is a bit too wordy. The singer seems to be working pretty hard to fit it all in.
I know Country is supposed to be really specific but I think we can get a little carried away.
The other thing I see is the opening line just does not grab me at all. It is a bit cliche. Seems like I've heard it a hundred times.
What if you went with something less direct

I remember Momma staring
at that mansion on the hill
And wondered if she was happy
Rockin' us on our porch when we were little.

I don't know if you really need the Still rhyme at the end of the first verse. It seems a little forced to me. I tried singing it with Hill/Little and it sounded natural and seemed to be a good near rhyme. But that's just me.

I really liked the change of direction in the bridge. Did not expect it at all. Very good.



Bill
http://www.soundclick.com/billrobinson
http://www.dreamqueststudio.com
Skype; bill.robinson12

"The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not." --Thomas Jefferson didn't say it

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Bill Robinson #612269 05/03/08 01:40 PM
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If a person tried hard enough they can find faults with any song. I like it, after all it is traditional, can't get much better than that. LOL

Everett Adams #612329 05/03/08 06:38 PM
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Lynn, i'm thrilled You like this, of course that's what we always hope for. The sentiment of this is based on real life so it may not be for everyone, but will hit home with ohers. Thanks for listening and taking the time to comment..moker

Moker Jarrett #612653 05/04/08 11:31 PM
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Tom, we appreciate you taking a listen and i don't remember getting to interact with you before, look forward to getting to know you...mj

Moker Jarrett #612655 05/04/08 11:36 PM
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Bob, appreciate the critique, we'll see how it goes for now and we'll keep our ears open as we pitch this...moker

Moker Jarrett #612702 05/05/08 03:05 AM
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Moker,

This is real nice. Not much to suggest, these are all small things:

Maybe change the child to a boy. That makes it a bit more clear on the casual listen that the "her" on the last chorus is the mom, and not the daughter again. I can see, however, wanting to keep it an all-girls theme.

Wasn't familiar with toe-head - perhaps just "daughter" or "son" would suffice.

The word "that" at the end of "Well I never understood that" seemed unnecessary and stood out as harsh/flat. You might want to cut it.

..ant


My albums "Rhythms of Life" and "Out On The Road" are on Bandcamp, Spotify and Apple Music.
ant #612773 05/05/08 12:49 PM
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Bill, it appears this one is meeting some opposition in the way it's crafted, but we have already gotten some publisher interest, guess we'll see how it all plays out and fix it if it needs fixin' and don't fix it if it ain't broke (stealin' lines from a recent song Dale & i are workin' on...ha)...thanks for the in depth critique...moker

ant #612777 05/05/08 12:57 PM
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Hi Moker,

You two make a great team. I really like this. The music, and the vocals fit the lyric very well. I think you're definitely pitching it to the right crowd. Good luck with it.


Have a goodun,

John W. Selleck BMI Songwriter
A day without learning is a day lost forever.

www.soundclick.com/johnsings
www.soundclick.com/johnwselleck
www.soundclick.com/johnselleck
https://www.soundclick.com/artist/default.cfm?bandID=1468958 For Selleck/Kay co-writes
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Everett, a simple thank you...:o) mj

Moker Jarrett #612860 05/05/08 05:54 PM
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Holy Moly this one is a gem. Moker, you really are kicking out the real deal...you've GOTTA be getting that cut soon. This one sure sounds good enough to me.

Keep on keepin' on!

We think you can...We think you can...We think you can...

-Lyle

Mark Kaufman #612862 05/05/08 06:12 PM
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Moker
We are all in this here boat together lookin' for a paddle..
There isn't a thing wrong with that song. the music works, the lyrics work, and some will like it and some won't.
All we can do is offer an opinion or a suggestion. In the end it comes down to do enough of the right people like it.

I hope someone picks it up.


Bill
http://www.soundclick.com/billrobinson
http://www.dreamqueststudio.com
Skype; bill.robinson12

"The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not." --Thomas Jefferson didn't say it

http://voidnow.org/
http://www.americansworking.com/
Moker Jarrett #612938 05/05/08 11:13 PM
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Radio ready, up beat and easy to listen to. Good luck with this one. Great story telling!

Tom W.

Tom W. #612963 05/06/08 12:10 AM
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Hi Mj and Rebecca,

There's a lot of good things going on here, so best of luck as you pitch ! smile jm

Last edited by Joice Marie; 05/06/08 12:10 AM.

perfection is unattainable, excellence is totally within reach

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Joice Marie #613087 05/06/08 11:57 AM
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ant, thanks for taking the time to listen and comment, time is at a premium these days, what with everyone working their ass off to pay for gas...ha...toe-head is a blonde haired baby...this is based on my co-writer's real life experiences for the most part, except for a few phrasing edits i was the music end of it, good suggestions you made, and i'll have her stop by for a visit just to get other's take on the work, when it's based on truth it's hard to get much more genuine than that...i know she wishes, like alot of us probably, that our parents lives weren't slipping away right in front of us...thanks again...moker

Moker Jarrett #613145 05/06/08 02:43 PM
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Moker,

This is a great traditional sounding Country song - I would think it would spark some commercial interest; it is so well done on all fronts: vocals, instruments and lyrics. I wish you the best of luck with it - if you can just get it to the right person/people....

Clint

Clint Anglin #613449 05/07/08 11:26 AM
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yea John , we have 2 people that can get something to Allison so if one of 'em steps up and actually delivers it, atleast the song can stand on its own 2 feet...ha...thanks for the listen...moker

Moker Jarrett #613450 05/07/08 11:28 AM
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Lyle, i think i can too...ha...but it's the holding my breath that has me, well, what should i do about this turning blue in the face?...ha...mj

Moker Jarrett #613487 05/07/08 01:07 PM
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I`m not a critic, but I know what is pleasant to my ear. this is excellent from top to bottom. one other singer I can close my eyes and see singing this is Sara Evans. I really enjoyed this..Lane



"Blessed are the words of truth and fiction,
one might save you from the other...Vincent
lane1777 #613501 05/07/08 01:56 PM
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Bill, well i'm glad we're paddling together...ha...this is one hell of an upstream current so batten down the hatches we've gotta ride this one one out cap'n. i'm in for the long haul and i fully expect every obstacle and have to hold that bar further up than i can reach...i understand about opinions Bill, no explanation necessary, i could send it to 20 publishers and if the right one likes it on the right day with the right pitch opp in front of him that rings a bell for this song...viola...pop the champagne cork, otherwise it's bud light...ha...see ya...moker

Moker Jarrett #613566 05/07/08 05:21 PM
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Hey MJ....don't leave out Jennifer Nettles of Sugarland on this one either....love this song!! Just me chiming in again...Jan

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I especially like the radio ready part :o) thanks Tom

Moker Jarrett #613609 05/07/08 09:18 PM
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JM, thx for the ears and well wishes...mj

Moker Jarrett #613610 05/07/08 09:19 PM
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Clint, i'm trying like hell to get that spark to ignite smile thx...moker

Moker Jarrett #613612 05/07/08 09:21 PM
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Lane, thx for the tip, i'll tell our plugger to give her a pitch...mj

Moker Jarrett #613613 05/07/08 09:23 PM
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Jan, i have 4 songs i'm tryin' to get to her...i'll add this now thx...moker

Moker Jarrett #613800 05/08/08 02:35 PM
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Hey Moker,

No nits here. Nice easy listening and enjoyable song.

cheers, niteshift

niteshift (D) #614455 05/10/08 02:24 PM
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Geoff, great to hear from you, thanks for listening, now go do something constructive like have a beer would ya...ha...mj

Moker Jarrett #614467 05/10/08 03:11 PM
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Nice intro music. Nice singing. Good solid song. I like the idea of the song and the lyrics. The background singing is good - and adds to the song. Fine song.

Tom
from Nebraska


Thomas Shea

Thomas Shea - Songwriting
http://www.soundclick.com/thomasshea

Justice - Songs
http://www.soundclick.com/justice-nebraska

Tom Shea #614479 05/10/08 04:28 PM
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Tom, really appreciate the listen and the comments...thank you...moker

Moker Jarrett #614482 05/10/08 04:43 PM
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Moker,

do you like baseball? I ask because out here in Seattle we have one of the best play by play announcers in Dave Neihaus. I love his home run call...it's a real powerful "SWUNG ON AND BELTED..." usually followed by some clever, powerful phrase...but my god, when you hear that opening statement you know the Mariners just hit a much needed homer...

Well...if you could hear me, I'm using my Dave Neihaus voice and declaring..."SWUNG ON AND BELTED..." This song is a home run!!!

Moker, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to know that you cast a mighty large shadow over this forum. And rightly so. I can't help but think anyday I'll read the "what's happening" section of this board and find you've finally got the major cut. I'm cheering for you Moker. Songs like this are part of the reason why.

The best to you!

Terrill


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“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.”
― Bob Marley

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Terrill, you're very kind to put me and these songs in such a light, there are several on here i am quite in awe of their ability so i ain't so sure 'bout that shadow you speak of...ha...i do know i try and take 2 positive steps toward that goal of a major cut everyday...thanks for the listen and the too kind comments...i'll keep swingin' and tryin' to belt one out..ha...thx...mj

Moker Jarrett #614565 05/10/08 10:02 PM
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Moker,

This is very pretty. I have two girls, so it really tugged at my heart strings. The music, words, singer, harmonies..all great! What a nice mother's day present for all of us. I think my mom would like it too. I could hear any hot female country vocalist singing this, really. Your demo singer did a great job for you. Wish you all the best with this.

Wendy D #614597 05/11/08 01:02 AM
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Hey Wendy, thanks a bunch, that's Teea Goans, great voice-always dead on, we have about 8 or 9 artists currently on our pitch list for this with fingers crossed :o)..thanks alot..moker

Moker Jarrett #614614 05/11/08 02:14 AM
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Hi Moker - I know everyone is telling you good job and crossing their fingers for you but I couldn't resist adding my name to the list of well-wishers. This song was great and has great commercial potential! I love it!

I know what toe-head means and I think most country folks would get that. And I am a huge Mariners fan, so I also say with Dave Neihaus "SWUNG ON AND BELTED...this one is OUTTA HERE!"

Keep us all posted if you hear any news on the publishing end!

Katie Powner #614628 05/11/08 03:40 AM
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Good one Moker. Your ear for melody is dead on with every song I hear you do. Amazing. Nice spin on the hook too,

Pete

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