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TV Drama
by Raymond Byabazaire - 08/31/26 09:46 AM
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 4,029 Likes: 28
Top 100 Poster
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 4,029 Likes: 28 |
Tom,
I came back for another listen and wanted to bump this song--it's so good. I had a question, are you saying any real words at the intro? I was just thinking that you could perhaps say something there, not sure--whatever, it should be not real clear but something that evokes "heed this warning!"
I also had an idea for the last line of the song--not necessarily do I think it's better, but may be worth consideration:
"You'll curse the day that your "conscience fell."
My thought was that this would be more profound and less literal, and may convey more dismay than just physically "getting the hell out of there."
Just throwing it out to ya, not saying it needs to be changed. Use it or lose it! Really like this song a lot!
steady-eddie.
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