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Weeks
by Gary E. Andrews - 08/29/26 12:08 AM
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Max Ceddo
by Gary E. Andrews - 08/27/26 11:50 PM
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Tin Lung
by Gary E. Andrews - 08/27/26 04:12 PM
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TV Drama
by Gary E. Andrews - 08/26/26 03:19 PM
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TV Drama
by Raymond Byabazaire - 08/26/26 12:29 AM
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 392
Serious Contributor
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Serious Contributor
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 392 |
Hi again - I see what Calvin's saying about leaden - it may not sing as well. But I know what you are talking about with that lead-colored sky. Icy wouldn't convey the same image and the lead contrasts with gold in the previous sentence. This is a very tiny change that might sing better but may not even sound different:
"As if the sky resembled melted gold
Instead of lead in wet December cold"
I like it how you have it just fine though. Anne
Anne M-W
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