hello NG.

as all ready mentioned you do come up with some great ideas and hooks BUT my "nit" would be the wordyness of this lyric.

do not know if I have asked you this but do you have any of your lyrics up somewhere with music and vocals? I would really love to here the mixing of the two to give me an idea if I am right or not when it comes to the "to many words".

besides that observation I like where this started from but like Micheal I question the third verse and its place here.

have fun and keep them coming.

douglas


"Is this a practice? They are all practices." John Denver

www.soundclick.com/dougmurphy