Aaron, (sure easier than the handle)

I like your song/concept as well. You have some great advice above, but will say this: I like it when you can get a lot of words fitting to the music, (so long as you can without it losing timing or syllables--a current trend), but if you can't, find other phrasing.

What struck me a bit awkward was in the chorus--I agree with Floyd, the 3rd line seems not the place for that expression as you've established in the line previous a bit of that same effect--I'd find a more humanizing expression or analogy there that people can "quickly" relate to. It's your chorus/hook, which will be most remembered and needs to flow naturally both musically and lyrically IMO.

I'm digging your song, nice job!

steady-eddie.