I think the idea, arrangement, melody and hook are all working together. You do have a room to improve the lyrics. You use the life/wife twice for instance and in each case, they were not very effective so I would revisit the lyrics and see if you can get something more compelling.

"I grew up and I went off to life,
Found a real nice job and found a real nice wife
But I always called home, just for remembering."

This entire section is weak and probably not even necessary because it really does not contribute to the main idea. Nobody says, ..."I went off to life" That is just not how people talk.

It is hard to tell how many generations you are spanning in this lyric and if you could focus on you and your dad, it would be a lot easier to follow. The first part of this lyric was right on focus and very effective, then you kind of strayed off the path.

The good news is, you have a really fine working idea and for the most part the music is working quite well.


"Imagination is more important than knowledge." - Albert Einstein