well...this is real nice...but...I'm sorry, young man..there's just too many words..

I'll cite one line as an example the lace curtains of our country home..the words lace and country are gratuitous and cluttersome....just not necessary..they and many others take away from a simple and memorable melody..

There's a reason why great books, and films, and plays list editors among the most important credits.

You could use on here, young man.. I think it would turn a good idea into a really good song.

Great sounding demo, by the way

Bob

Last edited by Bob Young; 05/03/08 11:50 AM.