Hi Moker
Good traditional country sound.

But I think I have to agree with Bob. It is a bit too wordy. The singer seems to be working pretty hard to fit it all in.
I know Country is supposed to be really specific but I think we can get a little carried away.
The other thing I see is the opening line just does not grab me at all. It is a bit cliche. Seems like I've heard it a hundred times.
What if you went with something less direct

I remember Momma staring
at that mansion on the hill
And wondered if she was happy
Rockin' us on our porch when we were little.

I don't know if you really need the Still rhyme at the end of the first verse. It seems a little forced to me. I tried singing it with Hill/Little and it sounded natural and seemed to be a good near rhyme. But that's just me.

I really liked the change of direction in the bridge. Did not expect it at all. Very good.


Bill
http://www.soundclick.com/billrobinson
http://www.dreamqueststudio.com
Skype; bill.robinson12

"The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not." --Thomas Jefferson didn't say it

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