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RY X
by Gary E. Andrews - 09/21/26 04:03 PM
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Soft Loft
by Gary E. Andrews - 09/21/26 11:52 AM
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,235
Top 200 Poster
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Top 200 Poster
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,235 |
Funny how things work out, Ian - Verses 3 and 4 were done first and are my favorites  I like v3 a lot. I think it would be a great start to a song. The problem is, I can't see it leading to V1 and V2. It's like they're from different songs. V4 is OK and perfect for a valentine. I hope your wife liked it! This is some good writing Scott, it's just not gelling for me as a cohesive whole. I think you should work on it some more. I think the problem is that those 1st 2 verses are believable/mystical/magical/mysterious things that most people accept as REAL PHENOMENA. You make it the focus of your lyric and then seem to abandon the emphasis. V4 might be a logical conclusion... but I think you at least need to work on a different V3 (Maybe save the current one for a different tune?). This Is REALLY good writing Scott. And it's an incredibly tantalizing start. I hope you're not mad at me for not thinking it's finished! Peace, Ian
Last edited by Ian Ferrin; 02/18/12 03:55 PM.
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"If you are stuck in your musical composing, be unreasonable. Change your environment. If you are stuck in your lyrical efforts, instead of forcing the same old words out, force yourself to do unreasonable things." -Brian Austin Whitney
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