Hey Travis,

Thanks for your edits to this!

I used your "living" in verse one and your "trusting" in verse 4!

In verse one, I didn't use the tears line, because I wanted to "save" the crying for the chorus.

And speaking of chorus ... I really like what you've done and if this ever gets music, I'll share your take on it with whoever does it. That being said ... I was going for brevity in the chorus, because I wanted the story to be all about Raju, with just a whisper of the narrator's thoughts.

I like your expecting cruel hands and those changes ... but I'm not sure I like them better or the same as what I have now, so I'm holding off there!

And, finally, in the verse about feeling the lash ... your change lets the listener know that he was often whipped, which is good, but I was going for the effect of his final whipping. The owner got so angry when they came to get him that he whipped Raju, trying to make him angry so that he'd chase away or harm the rescuers. Maybe, the way I have it, that's not clear enough, so you've got me thinking about that, too!

Thanks so much for your help!

Lisa