Originally Posted by John Lawrence Schick
That's a lot to take in Ben. You're quite a philosopher! laugh



Everything I See Is a Joke Waiting to Happen
By Elvis Nash
Everything I see is a joke waiting to happen.
Take olive oil, for example.
Why do olive oil people insist on calling it extra virgin olive oil?
There is no EXTRA virgin. Either you're a virgin or you're not. You can't be extra virgin. What the hell does that even mean?
And why do we need to say virgin at all? It's olive oil. I don't see the value in knowing its sexual history.
Now, let's talk about you people at the grocery store checkout stand.
I don't want to hear your life story. Pay for your groceries and leave.
Call your mother if you need to vent. I don't care.
Well, unless you're 23 with a nice ass.
Then, for some strange reason, I'm suddenly very interested in everything you have to say.
Apparently, I've got an hour to spare in aisle five listening to your problems.
"That's horrible! I can relate. Tell me more."
"Oh, finally! Somebody who understands me!"
Nope. Not really.
You just have a nice ass, and I'm old.
I didn't understand one word you said. You talk way too fast.
"You older men are so understanding."
Nope. We're just bored. So we'll listen to you.
"Well, it was really nice talking to you."
"Same here, sweetheart."
Now I've forgotten what I came into the store for, and I can't remember where I parked my car.
All because you had a nice ass.
Finally, I get home.
"Where's the food? And what took you so long?"
"Well, there was this 23-year-old girl with a nice ass. What can I say?"
"[naughty word removed]! NOW GO BACK AND GET THE FOOD!"
So, you see, men are doomed.
We can't help ourselves.
Stop feeling guilty. She had a nice ass.
Go with the flow of life.
One nice ass after another.
Except you fat men. You've already got one. You don't need another.
And now I'm back at the grocery store, trying to remember what the hell I was supposed to buy.
Probably extra virgin olive oil.
At least somebody in this story is still a virgin.


I have the jokes . Ai has the grammar

Last edited by bennash; 10/10/26 08:08 AM.
We’re all built from the same dust and dreams,
Different roads, but the same means.