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A test
by bennash - 05/26/26 07:18 AM
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Rob
by Rob B. - 05/25/26 11:14 PM
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Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 8,789 Likes: 85
Top 20 Poster
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OP
Top 20 Poster
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 8,789 Likes: 85 |
Love the hook Dom but in execution you do betray the fact you are not married
IMO your examples do a disservice to that excellent hook...the very first reaction by Elvis showed you that
Maybe rewrite on the basis of dumb but intimate things...you ate the cake she baked for her mom....one suggestion
Anyway, stellar hook... Not sure what means John, i cant write this title if im not married? Is David Bowie an astronaut?
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"The standard by which I now measure the things in my life is the following: If I was on my death bed, or if I knew I had a short time to live, would this issue be important? If the answer is no.. I don't sweat it at all. If the answer is Yes, you better believe it goes to the front of the order of today's business!" -Brian Austin Whitney
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