HiDee KaleyGal!

Here's what I see it could use/oughta have, JMO, natch!

Par.1: AOK
Par.2: Consider "...something SPECIAL to feel better," she said.
Par.3: AOK
Par 4: AOK
Par 5: Missin' (") Quote marks at beginning of Paragraph.
Then, as Babies Quote Mom, needs (') Single Quote Marks
'Hide children, hide!' (& I'd recommend an Exclamation Point on that Phrase, as-shown. ...under some brush(") needs double Quote Mark, at Paragraph's End.
Par 6: Tricky One. THINK this is EXACTLY Right: (...but it's confusing even me a bit): "The last thing we heard Mama say," whispered the other baby, "was 'Run down to the fence row. You'll be safe there. I'll come back for you as soon as I can.'"

All the Rest checks out Fine! Congrats on an engrossing & interesting Tale..which I know the Wee Ones'll love instantly & Us Grownups'll enjoy Reading to 'Em!

Best Wishes & Big Hugs,
Ol' Stan