you invited me back soooo...this is a lyric critique board and this doesn't resemble a lyric at all. I can't see how anyone could sing it. I can't read straight through it. as for the writing itself, it's really bad Anthony. I'm sorry but it's true. those puns are painful...not as painful as...as...Bealestreetabub, but they're still bad. dic-tionary is deserving of jailtime.

that new one you posted today is in lyric form but the hook is kinda dull and it needs one good line or at least an interesting theme. that's kind of my catch-all critique but it's true for most of what I read. of course if you have good music, how it reads doesn't matter. take care. [Linked Image]

------------------

Nashville demos etc:

https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/default.cfm?bandID=431939

other demos:

https://soundcloud.com/wabash-cannibal

Amazon Kindle books by Robert George you may enjoy:

1) Americana

2) Teenage Graceland

3) The Will to Be

4) Fort Mystery

5) Wheel Sea

6) My One True Love