Firstly, I'm disabled... So, I never fill my cart at the grocery store. I plan on quick trips once a week, never on weekends, just the essentials, so I can get in and get out... but I NEVER get a damn parking space up front. In fact, if you wait long enough, you'll see employees walk out to their vehicles, parked in the handicap spaces, have a smoke and a Coke, then stroll back in to work... Forget about the motor carts; They're always scattered all over the parking lot and dead as door knobs.

Once I finally make it through the front doors, from the back of the lot, with my cane in my wobbly and beat up buggy... I'm halted by a group of loudly laughing patrons blocking foot-traffic between the Christmas displays, discussing the price of eggnog and exchanging Thanksgiving photos. After about 30 seconds of politely waiting, I loudly clear my throat... They take the hint and I happily escape their boisterous banality. The victory is short lived however... as every frickin' isle is seemingly packed with relatives of the same heedless pedestrians.

At this point, presumably like most people these days , I habitually bypass all the overpriced inventory of seasonal crap that I used to enjoy, along with the bins of overstocked turkeys, and just settle for the minimal overpriced crap that I can get by with. Again, being the intelligent ape among zombies, I limit myself only to what will fit in the child seat of my battered cart to save time at check-out.

FUKK! Nobody can tell where the end of the line is at check-out...

Disgusted, I pull my cane from my buggered buggy, shove it somewhere over into women's underwear and limp away. Now, I console myself for parking in the farthest reaches of the lot... Leaving presents no challenge. Screw Bidenomics, screw Chinese imports, and screw Walmart!

On the way home, I wait 15 minutes trapped in a McDonald's drive through... I pay $15 for a lamp dried cheeseburger and cold fries which now reside in my kitchen trashcan. I drank the diet Dr Pepper...

Merry Fukn' X-mass!