Hiya Mike!
Thank you!!
I'm a freelance editor in my "other life" and the biggest thing I've noticed about whether a story writer will succeed is whether they can LISTEN TO and IMPLEMENT suggestions. For myself, I have *RARELY* listened to an editor's advice and *not* had my story improve as a result. Same thing works in music.

And I told ya I just needed to learn my own tune a little better. wink

OK - as for the chorus - I do play with melody ideas a bit while I'm writing/composing, until I decide which way I like it best.
I *know* your timing is dead-on perfect - you're amazing.
So.... which chorus did you like better? ...and I'll copy that one over.

I can do a quick copy/paste sort of edit this week, but a complete redo will have to wait till next week. I have a solo coming up for a church function next week that I haven't learned yet (just got the music) so that's going to take up my time for a while.

Thanks for the "groove" compliment too. Steve (my hubby) liked how it felt like it was cycling round and round. And yeah, I was going for a Heart feel, so, yay!

Linda

Originally Posted by Mike Caro Substudio
Linda,

Much much much better!!!! Wow now that's taking some suggestions and doing something about it. Night and day difference,

Now you are in the ball-bark smile

The vocal was a huge improvement.. the verses were quite good the melody and phrasing worked nicely... you fell into a POCKET, that's what most of the submissions are lacking, a groove.

Now you have sections that are uncertain, like you have different melodies over the chorus one time and another thing in the next chorus.