Originally Posted by Derek Hines
Hey Mike

It's been fun, but I think I'm gonna bow out now. I totally understand what you're doing with the song and you want to make it as cool as possible; however, I think there are some points of that I don't necessarily agree with. No hard feelings, would just rather keep things nice and mellow (I can tend to get rather flustered when my ideas aren't accepted blush ) Thanks for the opportunity to have fun with this song and see it reach higher levels! Can't wait to hear what the finished product sounds like.
Derek

Now I'm really confused...isn't Sub already using Derek's verse? Maybe I'm wrong, but I thought Derek sang it like this awhile back, but I can't listen right now at work without the whole restaurant hearing it too. grin If I'm wrong, please forgive.

Looks like you need a chorus that we haven't yet heard...I don't think any of ours work yet now that we hear the context of your verse and pre-chorus. This is an alternative rock song, and it's a break-up song...that chorus will need to tie it all together.

I really like the sound you've got happening in the verse and the pre-chorus. Especially the "let you go" part--it defines the feel of the song. A cool tune.

Now for the uncomfortable part. Mike, you are always one to call 'em like you see 'em, and it always helps others. So I feel I have to do the same for you, whether you agree or not: I think your ending tag is unappealing. I know the words aren't set yet, but it sounds like you might have made up your mind on this one no matter what...but I honestly think the sound and feel of the ending would be a mistake. I'm just sayin'.

http://www.soundclick.com/MarkKaufman